#so I thought I'd share some thoughts and facts and perspective

[bangtanhoesthings]

When I first discovered BTS, I was immediately met with countless fan theories and narratives which painted Yoongi as cold, distant, or “savage.” These labels were so frequently repeated that I began to internalize them, and, almost unconsciously, I found myself feeling slightly less connected to him than to the other members. But as I got deeper into the group, I realized something: how could I truly enjoy and support BTS while holding a biased view of even one member? I wanted to appreciate BTS as a whole and that meant giving every member a fair chance on my own terms.

So I set out on a personal journey to understand Min Yoongi for myself. I immersed myself in his music and rap, watched countless YouTube compilations, and paid close attention to him in their original content with focused attention on his expressions, interactions, and presence. And what I found was someone entirely different from the version I'd been told about. Yoongi is, without question, one of the most sincere, thoughtful, and warm-hearted individuals I’ve come across. He isn’t emotionally distant but simply expresses his affection differently. He gives himself completely to his members, to ARMY, and does so with quiet dedication. His kindness is subtle but unwavering. In short, he's a misunderstood sweetheart and before I knew it he became one of my top bias wreckers.

I share this because I’ve never understood how some fans, particularly in the Jikook and Taekook circles, form such strong opinions about Jimin or Taehyung based purely on hearsay or speculative narratives. How can you not feel the urge to form your own impression, free from the echo chamber? Why would you let others decide who someone is for you? Why wouldn’t you want to know them for yourself? I genuinely pity those who don't try, because these two are among the kindest, most remarkable individuals you could ever hope to admire. They are not defined by fan debates or edited clips taken out of context. They are artists, friends, and human beings with their own stories, strengths, and vulnerabilities. To ignore that in favor of someone else’s opinion is to miss out on the very heart of what makes BTS so compelling. They deserve more than shallow judgments based on rumors or groupthink.

Be cautious with the stories you're fed. Take the time to look a little deeper. Challenge your assumptions. Be bold enough to form your own perspective. You just might change your mind and discover something beautiful in the process. You may be surprised by how much more meaningful your connection becomes when it's rooted in your own discovery not someone else’s version of the truth.

So stay curious my friends. This doesn’t just apply to fandoms or the way we view public figures but it applies to life as a whole. Stop accepting every opinion as fact. Stop following the crowd simply because it’s louder. You owe it to yourself to think independently, to look closer, and to form your own understanding of people, of stories, of the world around you.

Don’t be a passive observer. Don’t be a sheep.

Ask questions. Challenge assumptions. Let your judgment be shaped by your own experience not someone else’s bias.

Curiosity is a quiet kind of power and it will take you far.

Peace and love 💜.

[eyesonlybutterflies]

Let me show you

𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘩𝘺𝘭𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘧𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘏𝘦𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘶𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳��

𝓹𝓪𝓲𝓻𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼: experienced!Heeseung x inexperiencedf!reader

𝔀𝓸𝓻𝓭 𝓬𝓸𝓾𝓷𝓽: 5.0k

𝓬𝓸𝓷𝓽𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝔀𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰: smut, fuckboy!Heeseung, swearing, reader in denial of her feelings for Hee, reader also kind of oblivious, Heeseung is DOWN BADDD, jealousy if you look close enough, Heeseung is still a sweatheart, pet names (baby, darling, etc.), (neck) kissing, grinding/dry humping, very slight restraints, boob sucking, hair pulling, teasing, big dick Heeseung, oral (m and f receiving), praise, face painting, unprotected sex, overstimulation, creampie, aftercare w gentleman!Heeseung, lmk if I missed anything

18+ 𝓜𝓝𝓓𝓘!!!

𝓟𝓻𝓸𝓸𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓭

𝓜𝓪𝓼𝓽𝓮𝓻𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓽

'She was soo good, y/n. I'm telling you if she even breathes in my direction I'd 100% fuck her again,' Heeseung shamelessy confesses to you. Heeseung and you have been friends since middle school and you're both now well into college. You've finally hit the age and stage where you openly talk about your sex lifes. Well... Heeseung's sex life.

It's not that you're an unattractive woman, in fact most of your female friends praise how amazing you look in every outfit, hype you up when you need it and all in all let you know you're very attractive.

Guys just haven't seemed to notice. Or at least, not many guys. You've been on a date or two, kissed a guy, even made out with someone, but that's it. You've never had sex, never given or received head, fuck you've never even touched a clothed penis.

Hearing all these stories from your friends kills your curious nature, '𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘵 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦? 𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘪𝘵 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭? 𝘞𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘐 𝘣𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥?' It's so bad that it's come to the point you're considering asking Heeseung to show you. I mean, he's your friend, you trust him and there are no feelings involved. It'd be a teaching moment for you and just another night for Heeseung.

Eventually you always pushed away that thought. It was just a stupid idea you had when you were horny and you chose Heeseung because he's the most attractive out of all your male friends. The first time had to be with someone you were actually into. Still, for some reason you felt the need to make him aware of your... situation.

'Hey Hee,' You shyly start. 'Mmh?' He says as he's staring at his phone, probably looking through his texts to see who to hook up with next. 'Have you never noticed I don't share my sex stories?' He stops and looks at you, 'Yeah, but I assumed you just didn't feel comfortable sharing.' 'Actually... I, I'm a virgin.'

Heeseung drops his phone in response. His eyebrows are raised and eyes so wide he looks like a deer in headlights, 'What??' 'I know it's embarrassing! I just, UGH!' You scream before grabbing a pillow and screaming into it, not being able to bare the embarrasment and too scared to make eye contact with Heeseung again.

A gentle force takes away the pillow you use to hide your face, Heeseung's face replacing the darkness of the pillow. His eyes soft, empethatic. 'Y/n, are you serious?' 'Yes and it's embarrassing, I don't even know why I told you, just forget it,' You ramble. You only had thoughts of telling Heeseung, not actually expecting you to have the balls to say it, and most certainly not Heeseung getting so close to you after your confession.

It'd have been a lot easier if he had just laughed in your face, whether it was because he didn't believe it or because he can totally understand why. Him just being a couple centimeters away from you was not what you had expected. It switched something inside you. You saw him from a different perspective, literally.

You'd never saw him as anything but your friend. Heeseung who was kind, Heeseung who made fun of you, Heeseung who took care of you when you needed someone. You never read into it too much. Why would you? He never confessed his feelings to you and it seemed like he was thinking of the next woman to fuck whilst still laying in bed with the previous woman.

But now that he's so close, you can almost look into his soul. The playboy facade almost seems to fade right in front of your eyes. However you quickly push it away. 𝘏𝘦'𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥, 𝘩𝘦'𝘴 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘣𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘺 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘳𝘯𝘦𝘥, 𝘮𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦 𝘩𝘦'𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘧 𝘢 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘦𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘶𝘱 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩.

He snaps you out of your thoughts when a hand lands on your cheek, 'Did you hear what I asked you?' You were so in your thoughts you didn't even notice Heeseung asking you a question. 'N-no, sorry.' With a smile, his beautiful smile, he asks again, 'Have you ever kissed before?' 'Oh god yes I have! I'm not 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 inexperienced!'

'Good, a pretty girl like you deserves appreciation.' Your cheeks flush, 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘩𝘦 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘢𝘺? Heeseung clearly sees your confusion and just laughs. 'You're just fucking with me! You fuckboys always say stupid shit like that!' You push him away, lowkey mad about the fact he'd play with your feelings in such an intimate moment.

Heeseung repositions himself next to you and you quickly grab a pillow to hug, both for you comfort and defense from Heeseung. 'I would never joke about that. Not when it comes to you.' Your head snaps to him, 'What the fuck is that supposed to mean?' 'Oh baby, please don't tell me you're that oblivious?' What??????

'You remember all those late nights where we would watch movies together freshman year of college because you felt homesick? God I can still remember all the songs in Mamma Mia.' 'What does that have to do with this?' 'Do you really think I'd do that with anyone else? I even cancelled bro nights with the boys to spend time with you.' 'But why are you in other women's bed every weekend?' You completely ignore the fact he basically confessed to liking you, only the other women he's been with occupy your mind.

'Because I've been waiting for you.' 'Heeseung what are you even SAYING right now?' You stand up, creating space between you two. Nothing is making sense right now. 'Y/n, I've had feelings for you since the day we met. Those feelings are still very strong, but I never dared telling you about them. I saw the way you were talking with other guys and just assumed you were hooking up, no strings attached with others and you just didn't feel comfortable telling me. So I did the same, but trust me, I wish it was you every time.'

The only thing you can do is throw your hands up to you head. Your mouth is hanging open but nothing is coming out. Everything is slowly starting to make sense. 'Why didn't you say anything?' You finally get out. All Heeseung does is stare at you. He studies your face, your body language, he's studying 𝘺𝘰𝘶. But not in a creepy way, but in a loving way. Like he's been waiting for this moment for so long and it's unfolding even better than he could have ever imagined.

'Heeseung, please talk!' You almost get frustrated, feeling tears in your eyes as you feel both confused, relieved and scared. He stands up, walks over to you and puts his hands on your waist. 'I'm sorry baby,' is all he says before he leans in to kiss you. Only he doesn't close the distance.

'Is this okay, darling?' You nearly melt into his touch as he moves one hand to your cheek and smiles. The kiss starts soft. Initially long and slow touches of your lips turn into more hungry motions as you both realise you're actually kissing each other and this isn't just a dream.

After years of yearning and denial, you're finally kissing.

And it feels good. Heeseung naturally takes the lead, licking your bottom lip as to ask for permission. You grant him that permission immediately, going in to grab his cheeks to prepare yourself for the lightheadedness he's going to give. Because if there's one thing you've learned about Heeseung's stories, it's that he knows how to kiss.

The kiss grows deeper. Heeseung pushes his lips into yours like he's a starved man. His tongue desperately searching for yours and once there's a steady, consistent rythm to your dancing tongues, something clicks in him.

Both his hands travel down to your ass and, without warning, lifts you up. A small shriek escapes out of your mouth ahead of you wrapping your legs around Heeseung. He leads the both of you back onto your bed. He very gently lays you on your back, as if you're made of marble and ready to crack at movement a little too harsh.

You wrap your arms around Heeseung's neck, letting him know you never want to change the scenery. Heeseung is so turned on by how beautiful you look under him, completely his and not wanting anything else that he's starting to moan in your mouth and slowly grind against your crotch. You push him slightly away, looking at him with large eyes, unsure of what to make of this situation.

Heeseung gets the hint and looks at you with concerned eyes, 'Is this too fast, baby?' You shake your head, gulping loudly. 'I've just never done more than making out,' you start, 'I've only kissed and made out with like 3 guys, never anything more.' 'Not even this?' He says as he presses his erection into your heat. You gasp and that's enough confirmation for Heeseung.

'Are you okay with us doing this?' Sweet Heeseung, always making sure you're okay and comfortable ever since the beginning. You nod, 'I actually... kind of want you to be my first.' Noticing his confusion you continue, 'I've been thinking about, you know, this, a lot and if I had to choose someone to do it with, I'd choose you.'

The smile that slowly creeps up Heeseung's lips give you butterflies, and not just in your stomach. 'Really?' He asks in that attractive ass expression, his eyebrow raised, a light smirk and slight sparkly eyes. You nod shyly, biting your lip to prevent yourself from saying something any more stupid. 'Well, baby, I'll make sure you won't regret this.'

Before he can resume the intimate kiss, you still slightly push him away, looking at him with doe-eyes, 'Is this gonna change us?' 'I better fucking hope it will.' The kiss picks back up right where it left off, except that it feels more intimate.

Heeseung's hands start to roam your body, starting at your cheeks, slowly going down and eventually landing on your boobs. He can feel your perky nipples through your shirt and it's making his buldge grow even tighter. 'Off,' he demands and you comply, taking your shirt off swiftly, making your tits bounce.

Sounds of you two kissing has stopped because of Heeseung's newfound focus on your boobs and looking at them in admiration. You get a little timid, never having shown them to a boy before, but as you try to hug yourself to hide them, Heeseung quickly grabs your wrists and firmly press them above your head. 'Don't hide,' he snarls, 'you're too pretty to hide.'

A warm flush spreads over your already burning cheeks. All this praise, action and physical contact making you lightheaded 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘰 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥'𝘷𝘦 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘪𝘱𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘥. Your tomato-red face seems to go unnoticed by Heeseung who is too busy slowly feeling your right boob with one of his hands. Not soon after his hot, wet mouth attaching to your left boob.

The sudden contact makes you gasp and your back arches slighty. Heeseung smiles against your chest, loving every second. He sucks on your nipple and as he detaches from it, he faintly lifts your boob with his mouth and makes a pop sound as he releases it again, only for it to bounce back erotically. 'Fuck you're making me rock hard,' he says before promptly going in again.

This time he's making out with your right nipple. He's slowly releasing your hands and repositions his on your waist. Whilst his mouth is busy licking your tits, sucking loudly on your nipples and moaning inbetween your tits, he's slowly grinding against your still-clothed, but slicky wet pussy. 'Baby you feel so good,' breathy sighs escape his mouth, 'I bet you feel so tight.'

One of your hands travel to his hair and holds a harsh grab. You pull his face away from your boobs and see he already has a foggy expression from just your tits. 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘰 𝘸𝘦𝘵. Never in your years of friendship did you think you'd end up in your bed with your hot friend who looks like he's almost cumming in his pants from just touching your breasts.

As you're pulling him back up towards your lips, a string of moans escape Heeseung's swollen lips. 'What's wrong, Hee?' You ask him with fake concern. 'I need you so bad,' he whines, 'Need to feel your wet pussy tightening around my cock.' You smirk as you let your free hand graze over his body until it lands on his crotch.

You become aware of just how horny he must be. You slowly start to rub his hard-on. Heeseung is absolutely falling apart on top of you. Every brush of a touch feels overwhelming.

'Please keep touching me.' 'Yeah you like it when I do that?' 'Yes, Y/n, and don't fucking stop.' Deep sighs and low moans are exchanged before you signal for him to lay on his back. Heeseung catches on to what you're trying to do as you lift his shirt and unbuckle his pants with the sweetest expression on your face, 'You don't have to do this if you don't want to.' 'I want to, I really do. I've been waiting for so long to do this.' Your excitement alone makes his cock twitch dangerously hard.

Just because you're inexperienced and nervous, doesn't mean you aren't the usual tease towards Heeseung. Very slowly undo his belt and even do him the honour of taking the belt off of his pants. You throw it somewhere in your room, but Heeseung doesn't care what you did with it, he just needs to get his dick out of his restricting boxers. And he will let you know he doesn't like this slow pace.

'Fuck, Y/n, stop doing that and just take it off.' You giggle, but refuse his wish. As slowly as you possibly can you pull just his pants off of him. Heeseung throws his head back as he feels less and less restraint against his dripping cock.

The only piece of clothing remaining from exposing his dick are his boxers, but even with just that you can tell how big he is. Your mouth is slightly agape as you look up at Heeseung's face. When you make eye contact Heeseung's face turns into a big smirk. He gently caresses you cheek, 'You can take it, baby. I know you can.'

Once you've built up all the courage you can, you hook your fingers around his waistband and pull his boxers down. His dick escapes immediately with a soft slap as it hits Heeseung's stomach. His balls and length are twitching from the exposure. It's veiny, very veiny. His tip is a redish pink from how long he's been hard and its slightly covered in pre-cum. He's more lengthy than girthy, but it's still wide enough where you 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 you're gonna have trouble walking the next day.

So mesmerized by his cock, you're only making eye contact with it instead of looking at Heeseung's scrunched up face. After you've stripped him free from his boxers, you slowly start to touch him. First it's a finger to see his penis bounce, then you wrap your entire hand around him, hearing Heeseung take in a sharp breath.

Slow pumps follow, unconsiously leaving your mouth hang open a little and Heeseung doesn't think twice before putting his thumb in your mouth, 'Suck on it.' You start sucking on his thumb, warming up your tongue before taking him in your mouth in a different way. Your pumps start to speed up and you're including his tip into the pumps as well.

When you hit that sensitive spot at the back of his tip just right, the most beautiful moan escapes from Heeseung, 'Your mouth, baby.' 'You think I'm ready?' 'I know you are. You're such a good girl sucking my thumb and jerking me off.' You bite your lip before gradually coming closer to his tip.

You start by licking the top of his tip, looking him deep into his eyes to see how much effect you have on him. A groan escapes his mouth, signalling for you to take more of him, and so you do. You take his entire tip in your mouth and start to swirl your tongue around it, stopping at that same sensitive spot. Moving the flat part of your tongue up and down with still just his tip in your mouth.

'Oh my fucking god,' Heeseung whimpers, 'You're sure you've never done this?' You keep bobbing your head at the same spot until you can feel his tip spasm. Without warning you start to take in 𝘢𝘭𝘭 of him. Surprised by the sudden move, Heeseung grabs your hair and unintentionally thrusts his hips upward, hitting the back of your throat, 'Shit, baby, I'm sorry.'

The words aren't reaching your ears because of the surprising pleasure you got from getting accidentally throatfucked. Something in your brain changes and you start to pick up the pace of your head movement. Heeseung is taken aback by it, but can't do anything about it since you make him feel too good.

Taking him all the way, at a quick tempo and not being used to this length has you gaggingly shamelessly. Saliva is dripping down your chin and tears are starting to form in your eyes. However you ignore all of those things. Seeing just how good you're making Heeseung feel makes you want to go harder, faster, deeper. You want him so deep in your throat, you don't even care if you get a collapsed lung.

Whilst your mouth is bouncing of his rock hard cock, you grab his balls. Massage them lightly and occasionally giving them a lick or slight sucking. 'Right there, darling. Aah shit ah,' is all Heeseung can moan. His eyes strictly on you, but his mind so far away, he's not even sure you're actually doing this to him.

'Fuck I'm gonna cum.' He groans, head thrown back, preparing for the load he's about to release. You're not sure what to do and whether Heeseung likes shooting everything down your throat or painting your face, so you keep your mouth attached to him, sucking him off through his orgasm.

Very soon after you start to feel sharp loads shoot to the back of your throat. You try to not waste a drop of his cum, but fuck he's cumming a lot. When you think he's finally done you detach your mouth from his dick, a mewl escapes Heeseung's mouth by the sudden cold.

To your surprise, he was not done cumming. A few strands of his cum land right on your face, still painting your face. Once Heeseung is back on earth and looks at you he sees you trying to wipe away the remaining cum, 'Stop.' You stop in your tracks and Heeseung sits up straight right in front of you.

One of his hands reach towards your face and his thumb is gently cleaning the spots on your face you hadn't cleaned yet. 'Open your mouth.' You obey and Heeseung puts his thumb back into your mouth, 'Good girl, cleaning up the mess you made.' Heeseung is looking at you with so much fondness, loving the fact you're just as filthy as him.

Without you having much say, Heeseung grabs your waist and makes you switch positions. 'Now show me that pretty pussy,' is all he says before sliding off your bottoms. 'Fuck, Hee, please make me feel good.' 'Don't worry about that, darling,' he gives you a quick wink as he's pulling his top off.

His warm mouth connecting with your clit sends shivers down your spine. He takes his time as he starts licking it, making sure to keep his eyes on you to confirm you're feeling every single movement. The licking slowly starts to turn into sucking as one of his fingers is teasing the walls of your hole, loving the way it's clenching down on nothing.

'Hee, oh my god yes, put it inside.' Heeseung fulfils your wish and his long fingers enter your pussy. A gasp slips out of your mouth and you clench down on him. 'Aww, baby, already too much?' 'N-No! I just, ah shit-' It's mind-boggling just how much power he has with just one finger.

At a slow pace he starts to pump his fingers in and out of you, deeper with each time he puts his finger back in your cunt. 'Hee, oh fuck, yes!' Your words slurring the deeper he pumps into you. At some point he's still fucking you with just one finger and all you do is babble, producing more sounds than words. Heeseung fucking loves you like this, so he decides to add another finger to see how you'll react to that.

The second finger enters your already tight pussy and it sends your head spinning. You constrict so tightly around Heeseung, he almost thinks you're cumming, 'Holy shit, this is what just fingers do to you, dear?' 'O-Only- fuck shit- only yours,' you manage to get out.

With the biggest grin on his face he asks, 'Mmh your fingers don't have this effect?' You shake your head. 'Shit, baby, I guess we'll just have to do this more often,' he says before diving back in. This time he takes his fingers out of you and starts tongue-fucking you.

Two hands fly to his hair, trying to pull him away, 'Too much?' You nod. 'Wanna stop?' You shake your head. Heeseung snickers against your core. While he goes back to your hole, trying to push his tongue up to your sweet spot this time, his nose brushes against your clit.

The combination of stimulation has you close. Your cunt grips to Heeseung's tongue, your hands use his hair as support and your thighs start to shake violently. Heeseung continues eating you out even through you closing your legs. His head is now stuck between your inner thighs and dripping wet cunt.

If there's one place he wants to die, it's right here.

'S-shit- gonna cu-cum!' Is the last thing you yelp before a wave of ecstasy flows through you like you've never experienced before. 'Good girl, cum on my face,' Heeseung mumbles against your core whilst still riding you through your high.

'Are you okay, darling?' You nod, mind still in another place. 'Good. Are you ready for my cock now?' A finger enters your hole. Heeseung streches you out, making sure you can still take his girth. 'Your pussy certainly is.' You look at him, he's smirking wide, waiting for your verbal consent before rocking your world.

'Please be gentle,' you say as your mind slowly gets back to earth and realisation hits you that you're really about to lose your virginity to your hot friend, of whom you could only dream of fucking. 'Always, my pretty baby.'

An even darker red blush spreads your cheeks as you push yourself up a little more straight. Heeseung notices what you're trying to do and lifts you up, firm but tender. 'Are you comfortable?' 'Yeah, are you?' Your innocent, sweet, but still dazed eyes makes Heeseung's cock twitch so hard, he has to physically restrain himself from slamming his cock deep in your pussy right now.

'Y/n, baby, I'm always comfortable with you. If you're feeling any doubt, even if it's really small, tell me. We can do this another time if you're too worn down or are having d-' You interrupt his rambling by crashing your lips onto his.

'Fuck me, Heeseung. I need you.'

That's all Heeseung needs to hear. He lines himself up with your heat, teasing you by grinding against your fold, but not entering your gaping hole. 'Hee, stop playing, fuck me.' You say exasperated.

At a steady pace he slowly enters you. Both of you are gasping. Heeseung's cock larger inside of you than you expected. Heeseung on the other hand has to restrain and repeat to himself to take it slow. He sees how you're struggling taking even a fifth of him, so he can't just slam himself inside you.

After Heeseung has completely dissapeared inside of you, he stops, letting you adjust. 'You look so gorgeous right now.' Your hands shoot up to your face. You're so red you feel like your head is about to detonate. Heeseung caresses your head, smiling from ear to ear. 'Is my pretty girl ready for me to move?' You nod and Heeseung leisurely moves out of you.

Once out of you, he enters again, but this time filling you up a bit quicker. This continues until he's just short from jamming into you. 'You okay, dear?' 'Mmh.' Your face crunches up, hands now placed on Heeseung's back. He dips down to plant a kiss on your cheek, 'You're doing so good, taking me so good.'

'Hee, harder please.' Embarrassment smeared on your face as soon as the words slip out of your mouth. 'You want it harder?' He beams, 'Didn't see you as such a dirty girl, baby.' A moan comes out as Heeseung immediately ups the pressure.

His cock hitting you against your cervix, balls slapping against cunt and heavy breaths escaping Heeseung's mouth. He's such a mess, but he doesn't want to let you know. He doesn't want to let you know how much of an effect you have on him. He usually lasts rounds without cumming, but with you? God he grips the bedsheet beside your head so tight, his knuckles turn white, he's focusing more on not cumming than to pound inside you at a consistent rate.

But when your pussy clenches down hard on him due to hitting a mind-blowing spot inside you, he drops his head in your neck. He's biting his lips hard and grips your waist to stop you from creating more friction. 'Y/n, fuck you're gonna make me cum.' One of your hands glides to his hair. You pull his face up to look you in the eyes. You want to show him how good he's making you feel, since his dick makes you unable to make sentences.

'Hee, good, so fucking good.' 'You like it?' 'Uh-huh.' You bob your head fast. Heeseung's mouth falls open, he knows he's close. You can feel he's close too and you slam your lips together, kissing him fiercly.

Like a bomb, Heeseung explodes. Shots of hot cum hitting you deep in your pussy. Your tongues stop dancing as the only thing exchanging between you two are moans. The warm liquid inside you not only gives a mouth-watering sound, but makes everything feel extra sticky as Heeseung is slowly fucking the cum out of your pussy.

Heeseung pulls back, not just his mouth but his entire body. You don't want to stop. You wrap your legs around Heeseung's waist and your hands around his neck and passionately pull him back in, 'Not done yet, Hee.' Heeseung is surprised by your almost desperate attitude, but fucking loves it.

Sloppy thumps of his cock in your pussy continue. Heeseung ignores the overstimulation. How can he when you look so pretty and fucked out underneath him? So desperate for a climax, completely ignoring Heeseung's struggle to selfishly pursue the best orgasm you've ever had

Briskly, Heeseung repositions himself where he's not laying on top of you, but able to grab your thighs and fuck you hard. And so he does. He slams hard inside you, making sure he's hitting your G-spot. He rams in at a pace that has you gasping, crying and screaming all within 5 seconds. 'You like that, huh?' 'Yes! Heeseung yes!'

As your thighs start to shake and your cunt starts to clench down on him again, Heeseung knows you're gonna have an even better orgasm than before. From the overstimulation still lingering from your previous orgasm to the delicious moans coming from Heeseung's mouth, your whole body feels like it's gonna fall apart.

'Heeseung!' You scream in a high pitch as you're send over the edge. Everything collapses; your legs close tightly around Heeseung's body, your lower body moving up in the air before falling back in the mattress for your back to arch tall, pussy contracting Heeseung's cock so hard he can barely move as it's almost making him cum again, your eyes roll to the back of your head, mouth falling open with only moans and variations of Heeseung's naming falling from your lips, your hands latch on Heeseung's back and your nails digging deep into his skin, and sweat dripping down from every inch of your body.

Your head is pushed deep into the pillow with your neck strained. Once you've come back to your senses you see a proud Heeseung looking at you. His eyes shining and a smile sweet like candy. 'Knew my girl could do it.'

He slips out of you and quickly dissapears into the bathroom. Your head is still too hazy to comment something. Heeseung returns with a damp washcloth and starts cleaning you up. No words are exchanged as he cleans everything from you thighs to your face. He gently lifts you up in bridal style and sets you down on the chair at your desk. Before you can ask, Heeseung grabs a new set for everything for your bed.

When he's done he sighs, happy with himself. He grabs you a new pair of underwear and shirt and puts them on for you. You're amazed at how gentleman he is. Almost as if he can read your mind, Heeseung says, 'Only for my princess.'

Smiles are exchanged as he carries you back onto the, now freshly made, bed. You shyly close the distance between the two of you when Heeseung claims his spot next to you. Noticing your hesitation, he takes the initiative and places you on his chest. You hear his steady heartbeat in the comfortable cuddle as you both drift off to sleep.

𝐋𝐢𝐤𝐞𝐬, 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝! <𝟑

[1shirt2shirtredshirtdeadshirt]

Sexism in TOS: Worst Offender, or Progressive in Retrospect in Comparison?

I see a lot of folks claim that TOS was the most sexist of the Star Trek shows by a landslide -- and while I agree that it definitely suffered from the sexism of the times, I also have other perspectives to share to give some food for thought.

I am of course not insinuating that TOS isn't sexist -- it is, but I have to ask folks to consider the breadth and depth of Berman's sexism in his run and ask yourself: Was Gene Roddenberry genuinely more sexist in his storytelling and delivery than Rick Berman?

I'm not telling you to feel one way or the other, but all I ask is that you hear me out and consider some perspectives and make your own balanced assessments. Nobody is obligated to share my opinion, but it means a lot just to have folks hear it and see their thoughts on the subject. So here is what I was originally responding to:

Someone's response to this photo:

"Devil's advocate. This was a part of the popular form of cardio during the production time of TNG. Yes, it was heavily sexualised by men, but so is literally every other way women work out. Men have been caught taking pictures of women while trying to do dead lifts, running on tracks and working on sled machines. They post them online to share too. The fact is, there is no way a woman can be shown working out without it going there. And yeah,t hat includes the combat forms of workout they do in Star Trek. Just look at how Dax dresses when she spars with Worf. Yes, they're dating, but still, same goes when 7 does and any other female.

Aerobics routines like this were made dirty and cringy. This was what women wore then by and large. This is how the workout was done. We make it cringy."

My response to them:

"I respect your take, but I disagree on a few fronts.

The miniskirt was chosen by the TOS female cast, not the male cast, specifically requested by Grace LW and affirmed by Nichelle and Majel who would go on to vehemently defend the miniskirt over the years as comfortable and embraced by them.

Grace said it was comfortable and seen as a symbol of female sexual empowerment during the 60s and thought it would be a progressive garment (and turns out that it was, as it was later adapted and worn by male crew as a skant on TNG) -- FYI those were designed by a gay man and Gene approved them.

This was also supposed to be Spock's TMP outfit:

Literally lingerie.

We saw both Uhura (who saves Kirk in from Marlena Mirror Mirror) and Yeoman Landon (the first to initiate combat with a classic Kirk-esque kick to help the Captain being attacked in The Apple) carry out their combat training in their Starfleet uniforms without ever being made to change into any ridiculous workout gear.

In fact, I'd argue Jim Kirk was sexualized even more than the ladies of the week on the show and I saw his naked body more than anyone else's on a fairly regular basis. He wore red yoga tights while topless in Charlie X while the women wore full length gymnastic suits that covered their entire body. If anything, it went out of its way to avoid sexualizing women practicing fitness in those scenes and instead focused on Kirk.

Gene confessed that he asked to have Shatner filmed in suggestive/provocative ways to "give something to the ladies", so he -- as he said -- liked to "film him walking away" or have him conveniently busting out of his shirts in just about every episode as it were, because Shatner apparently had great assets. LOL

Gene made an effort to at least sexualize both if he was going to sexualize one, and he carried that attitude forward in wanting the m/m and f/f scenes in the background on Risa for TNG. He also insisted that the men and women wear skimpy outfits on THAT TNG planet. You know the one. LOL I mean the dudes even had on less than the women:

Gene also gave permission to K/S shippers to have their conventions back in the 70s when he was asked for permission. Gene and Nimoy felt with all the skimpy outfits they had the ladies wear, why not let the ladies and gay men have their fun, too? It's how we ended up with moments like this:

Yes, those are two people dressed up as Kirk and Spock's penises doing interpretive dance. Gene didn't give two damns. LOL

In my eyes, that was a very progressive take on Gene's part for the 60s. It was actually PARAMOUNT STUDIOS who had the big problem with K/S stories and vehemently tried to shut them down. Gene literally hired slash authors on his payroll and even had several slash stories/writers published in his official Star Trek books (The New Voyages & The New Voyages II).

I feel I saw Uhura and women in TOS engaged in more physical combat/altercations defending themselves that Troi or Bev were shown holding their own.

In fact, Kirk used to get furious when someone would "dress up" his female crew members without their consent (Trelane episode, Shore Leave episode) because like his male crew members, he wanted them to be treated professionally and to also have his male crew act professionally.

Berman brought some of his own personal biases into Star Trek that in some ways regressed it. While TOS had blatant sexism and was called on it time and again, that show was made in the 60s -- a solid 21 years before TNG. We as a modern audience understood why some of it was cringe/sexist due to the time period -- look at any other media coming out in the 60s and Star Trek was miles ahead of what other shows were doing.

Compare that to Berman who was churning sexist stuff out when women like Starbuck and Scully were simultaneously on screen on other programs airing, and we had already had Sigourney Weaver and other strong women in Holywood playing respectful roles.

In my eyes, there was no need of the sexism seen in TNG but especially VOY and ENT. There was no excuse for it when other shows were writing women far better and a number of those weren't even set in the future like Trek was, making it age even faster due to having those dated perspectives frequently highlighted.

In the Center Seat documentary as well as "The Fifty Year Mission" book you will find cast members, writers and other studio alumni who attest to this. Some discussions from "The Fifty Year Mission":

"First, Berman was supposed to have been a real sleaze ball . . . According to Terry Farrel, he would go on constantly about how her breasts weren't big enough, how she should do something about it, and how his secretary was a good example to follow as she had huge breasts. She even had to have fittings to get larger bras, and that was all done at his behest.

Later Berman and Braga developed a name for Jeri Ryan's character prior Seven of Nine. They originally called the character "perineum" which if you look it up it is the area between the anus and the scrotum. Later they floated the name "6 of 9". I mean, what does it tell you about where these two were coming from in the development of this character if they had names like that put forward in all seriousness for her?"

Gene Roddenberry also had some of his own more progressive ideas for TNG cut or watered down by Berman. Roddenberry agreed TNG should have homosexual relationships and representation at a con in the 80s and insisted on it in a meeting with his writers -- something Berman later would not honor. Gene wanted the AIDS episode, showing m/m and f/f in the Riza scenes -- these were some of Roddenberry's requests to include in TNG that Berman later stonewalled.

Berman's era was sadly dated by his own misogynist bias, IMO, to the point that it can somewhat hurt the shows he worked on through his cringe egoism and blatant disrespect toward his female cast.

There is a reason why Gene could keep female actresses working with him and Berman had a revolving door of women that he couldn't seem to keep working for him -- he was abhorrent to women, on and off set. Gene wasn't perfect at all, he had a lot of issues himself -- but Berman was a whole other level. Just look at what he did to poor Jolene Blalock, Marina Sirtis and his toxic commenting on her body weight which exacerbated her struggles with eating disorders, or how he treated and talked to Terry Farrell.

Anyway, just some food for thought. I'm not saying anyone is wrong regarding a take like that, but there are a variety of ways to look at this. Gene Roddenberry isn't a saint by any means, but it definitely bothers me how folks will tote the Berman era as if it were the lesser of two evils or the more progressive depiction of women when I felt there were far more concerning portrayals of women in his era with far less justification.

(P.S: I don't event want to go near the sheer amount of "creepy old dude/villain preys on innocent/naïve/scared young woman or little girl" stories there were in Berman's era, either. But that's a whole other can of worms I can write about in a part 2.)

[xamag-draws]

BBR thoughts 2024

Since I mentioned that I finally dusted off an old project of mine and was ruminating on how I'd remake it, I thought I'd elaborate a little, now that I've solidified some concepts. For funsies

This is gonna be a bit of a long and unfocused one, but I don't share my personal thoughts here often, especially the stuff about my projects I always marinate in. And for once it's something that people have existing context for, so hey why not

So for anyone who hasn't been following me for a gajillion years, The Black Brick Road of OZ was a webcomic that I posted around 2013-2015, back when I was in highschool going on college (which is kinda crazy to think about). It was sort of a darker twist on The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, although I definitely leaned a lot more into dark humor more than anything in those first few chapters

I don't think it's available to read anywhere anymore, and I know people have been asking me about it. So here's the full proper archive of BBR, as full as it can be with deceased Flash

I totally used it as an excuse to shamelessly and self-indulgently experiment. It had interactive pages and GIFs and was wayyy too overproduced for what I could handle or what was necessary, but I did have great fun making it while it lasted

Unfortunately, that excess and the fact that I've changed too much as a person by the time I was in college is what ultimately killed it. The direction I wanted to go in was practically unrecognizable from the original idea started back in 2011, so there were many old hold-ups that I felt ruined it

At the time I kinda wished I could start/rewrite it all over, but considering that I pretty much had the entire script done at that point, it felt like a pointless sisyphean task. So I just put it on a shelf and didn't look back for about 8 years, because I didn't know what else to do

Now to be fair, the nature of my art has always been iterative and cyclical; when I feel like my creative juices have run dry I prefer to leave a project to marinate and move on to something else; cycle through other old things and bring in new skills and perspectives into the mix when I'm ready again. Not very productive, but it is what makes me happy to work on my OCs; I'm doomed to hit a wall with them eventually and I need some time to be able to find a new direction

So that said, I'm glad that BBR was left to marinate for that long. I don't think I was prepared, emotionally or intellectually, to tackle it again until now. The Wizard of Oz book (and the entire series of them, really) has always been near and dear to my heart, but there's a lot of context around it that I'm only unpacking now that I'm older

I think I always inherently feel negatively about the stuff I've made in the past, like its faults always jump out to me more than the positives, especially the more time passes. I've never liked that, and I do really appreciate the kind things people have to say about BBR to this day. The fact that it still can be recognized and remembered is very sweet

When I left it, I already found it "kinda cringe", and that feeling only deepened with years. When I took my first look back at it, asking the question "how would I rewrite it now?", at first I took a very cynical approach, as in "everything would have to be torn down"

But the more I sat on it, the more I found that I still see some merit and charm in the ideas I was putting out; I just didn't know how to execute them at the time (not to pretend that I know what I'm doing now, but I certainly know more at least). Turns out a lot of my old concepts could be changed substantially with just a few small tweaks. So I'd say that's a nicer way to think about my previous work

If you haven't seen yet, I posted a first draft of my new designs for some of the characters (the main group, the Goods and the Wickeds). Definitely subject to change, but more or less how I see them now

I'm just playing with these concepts; by no means would I attempt to remake BBR right this moment. Call it a pipe dream among my other ones. But just for fun, this is the direction I'd like to take:

Nowadays I'd probably make it a visual novel, with more emphasis on the visual part than the novel because I'm no English prose writer by any means. It'd still let me play a little with the interactivity while helping cut some corners on the drawing part (only some, I imagine I'd go hog wild anyway)

I've always intended for some events inspired by the sequel books to take place in BBR's past. Stuff like Jinjur's revolt or Ozma's rule preceeds the main events here. So I think it would be fun to follow the past of a few key characters alongside the main story. One chapter focusing on the present quest to see the Wizard, then one focusing on the past events (that are maybe reflective thematically); rinse and repeat

I'm also sticking a little closer to the original text in some regards. Not everything that I enjoy from the books would be translated here, it's still just a very loose fantasy on the material; but I'd like to be closer in spirit at least

I like mature, wise and powerful Glinda, I like kind and vulnerable Tin Man, I like the Wizard being a pathetic yet loveable liar, so I'm sprinkling in more of that for example

I'd like to keep some whimsy, but make it more grounded and a bit more serious to be coherent in tone. I think the original TWWOOZ book was a more realistic fantasy in some ways, even for the standards of the time; I like its simple but vivid tactile descriptions and details like bringing attention that Dorothy needed to eat and sleep

I find it funny that Baum specifically was averse to making his books scary or unpleasant, finding that unnecessary for telling a compelling kids story, but they still can get pretty dark and disturbing, at least for our modern sensibilities. Let's just say that I intend to use the Evoldo and Chopfyt storylines for my purposes. In that way, I feel like a "darker" Wizard of Oz retelling can still mostly be tonally in line with the original and balance it with enough heart and occasional humor

I slowly grew to appreciate the quaint old-timey quality of the original series, as well. The first book is both timeless and very much a product of the 1900s. Originally I tried to give it a little modern or at least anachronistic spin, but it was moreso because it's what I knew best, so these days I'd rather intentionally lean into the time period. Still not fully historically accurate by any means, but at least directly acknowledging the influence

The events of the story span across 40 years of these characters' lives, so I'm drawing inspiration from the entire so-called La Belle Epoque: the time period around 1880s-1920s. Basically I'm cooking, and my soup is old Victorian fashion morphing into Edwardian fashion and slowly inching towards flappers

Some new Dolly outfits

Lots of crazy things, political changes and innovations were happening at the turn of the century, which I think is noted and reflected by Baum in the books as well; the character of Tik-Tok might not blow any minds now, but he was one of the first robot characters in literature at that point; and don't even get me started on Jinjur, etc. Plenty of really interesting stuff one could lightly ponder in an Oz adaptation these days

Aesthetically, art nouveau has always been a big artistic influence for me, and it'd definitely be its time to shine here. John R. Neill's illustrations of the Oz books often keep me company as well. Nouveau architecture in particular fits that fairytale whimsy extremely well imo

I'd allow myself a little bit of art deco here and there, but ultimately its intimidating geometrical splendor is an antithetical to the flowery nature of nouveau and I associate it with a completely different era. Definitely fitting some characters like my Wicked Witch of the West, but shouldn't be overused

One of my main problems with the original BBR was that eventually I lost track of what it was even about; and the original ending felt too mean and unfulfilling to be worth it. Now I'd like to stick to the theme of home and family as my main theme, but in a different, more bittersweet way than in the book

An interesting connection I made is that a lot of my aforementioned older key characters (the Witches, Jinjur, the Nome King, etc) all came from the same reformatory as kids, that's how they know each other. In my recent research I learned that in those reformatories it was usually frowned upon to release the children back to the families, which were seen as the original corrupting influence regardless of the circumstance. The reformatory did everything in its power to cut that connection and make itself the only family those wayward kids were supposed to know and love. That's an unexpected tie into the theme of home that I'd like to explore as well

So yeah that's the current state of it. I have a bunch of outfit concepts I'm slowly cooking, although I'm now sure whether I'd post them... But I do miss these funny guys, and I'm glad some people still do as well :)

[chronicdelusionistsart]

"Does He Know, Chat?" - The Conflict of Timbern

There's so much about Tim Drake: Robin that is characterized by being a cancelled run. Like, every reading of it should come with the context that they meant to do way more and were forced to close the doors early because of sales. The knowledge that we'd basically been doing Act 1 this whole time puts a lot into perspective!

While the overarching plot had just started to kick in and I think that's what most people catch, that it seemed slow to move (Something I think isn't necessarily true either but that's another day another longpost). BUT I think many people miss that we'd also just started to hit the meat of Tim and Bernard's relationship.

Specifically, we'd just - JUST - gotten enough information to deduce the central complication to their relationship. A miscommunication of epic proportions that affects how two people that very much love each other view the other and their place in the relationship. One that actually does have a few cracks showing on-panel! I think - and I'm being more speculative than usual here, but I feel solid about this one - if the comic had gone on, we'd have seen this become The Conflict.

Spoilers for Tim Drake: Robin under the cut. And as a VERY important note, because this is under the lens of an exploration of what the run was building to before it was cancelled, we'll be assuming that information given out in the last two issues was what the writer intended to give out later, but rushed for the ending.

Anyway, I call this game "Does he Know, chat?"

Step 1: Bernard Knows

Yeah, this is pretty straightforward. He says this one out loud to the audience.

I've previously made the case, or at least implied that it is the case, that Bernard not only knows, but he knows that Tim is Robin for his entire time onscreen for the TD:R run. This is because he is hilarious about it.

Absolute icon. He's so unserious

He's hilarious about it and he's also... cagey about it. He lets Tim move at his own pace about telling him, but he also pries gently into it when he thinks Tim might be in over his head.

RIGHT, ANAKIN?

we're coming BACK to this conversation later in full trust

When exactly did he figure it out? Dunno. Doesn't really matter for anything besides comedy value. I think it is the most funny if he somehow put it together years ago, but I think the evidence of his trolling and doublespeak points to somewhere between his reintroduction in Urban Legends and the start of TD:R - you could argue that him asking Robin to take his last words to Tim is when he figures it out, but that's ehhhhhh. It don't mattah.

Step 2: Tim Doesn't Know Bernard Knows

So like. Tim doesn't fucking know, chat

No literally like I'm combing through the entire comic. Is there any indication he knows besides Bernard assuming that he does? We see his thought bubbles. Since it's really hard to show the absence of a panel let's just take some looks at Tim Drake's Inner Monologues While Hanging Out With The Guy That He Allegedly Knows Knows His Secret Identity

I could scrape for more examples, and there are more, but we get this, right? This is not how you think about the guy you know knows your secret. He is in fact straight up anxious about Bernard finding out that he's been lying to him. He goes out of his way to point out that he's not sharing his full self, which would presumably include, as the mooks put it, da Bats.

Actually, no, I changed my mind. Let's scrape for more examples. All of those are pretty early on, so what about in the middle of the comic?

Still actively hiding his mask from Bernard. Visibly panicked. From Bernard's revelation, we know that Bernard is fully aware of who he's talking to - one might even take this conversation as him prodding at Tim to just stop the charade already, but having fun with it.

Like "I don't think I'd be dating my boyfriend if it weren't for you" speaking to the boyfriend in question. LMAOOOOOOOOO Bernard I'd die for you

Tim's so firmly separated his identities and doubled down on keeping this secret from Bernard, in fact, that in their penultimate meetup before the finale, he grieves the fact that he can't be there to comfort Bernard as himself.

I don't think this is because he was simply unwilling to come as Tim. This is, put together with everything else, the behaviour of someone who. Well. Doesn't Know, chat.

Oh yeah and there is also that he outright says "Bernard can't Know" but what would the fun be in leading with that 💖

Step 3: Bernard Doesn't Know Tim Doesn't Know Bernard Knows

Okay so now we're really getting into the juice of this.

Bernard thinks they're on the level.

A lot of people see this as proof that Tim does in fact know, but the thing is that, as we just handily established, everything we see from Tim's POV contradicts this. Sometimes explicitly.

Which leaves the obvious answer - that Bernard is an unreliable narrator. He doesn't fucking Know, chat!

Hey sooooooo remember how I said that Bernard has a habit of dropping Robinisms into conversation or bringing up Tim to Robin because he's prodding at Tim to drop it?

Bernard you are soooo insane for this level of doublespeak. Just talk to your boyfriend my man

Bro sincerely thinks that Tim is just. Holding out on him on a pretense. This explains why he is so GOD DAMN MAD when Tim comes knocking as Robin when the Chaos Cult comes back to town.

Like. From the Bernard POV. The disrespect from Tim here.

Step 4 - Ruh Roh Raggy

This is, as the writers' workshops say, THE CONFLICT. The fundamental disconnect of Tim and Bernard's relationship is that they're going through the same motions and interpreting them completely differently!

Tim DOESN'T realize Bernard is smarter than he appears he DOESN'T realize that every time he's sent Bernard away or tried to send him away to deal with something, something that happens repeatedly

that Bernard has known that he wasn't letting him into his life all the way and he DOESN'T trust Bernard enough to let him in despite Bernard making him very happy. He's so hung up on doing the relationship Right and not compromising Robin as he learned it from Batman (Themes!) that he misses that he has a competent partner right next to him who is willing to be his equal.

I sincerely believe that we were in the buildup for this to come to a head when the run was cancelled. The buildup itself is, in fact, excellent - as we've proven, if you're paying attention, you can see this coming like an oncoming train.

I actually specifically want to highlight how tightly Page fucking 2 of the run sets this up. Like mmmmmm writing masterclass here

This page is doing double duty as foreshadowing the Moriarty fakeout (Ooooh is Bernard the bad guy? No lol) and just setting up that Bernard knows and that Tim is too distracted by Bernard... being the Bernard he likes to put forward... to notice.

Like it is genuinely impressive how many conversations in this run, on reread, mean completely different things to both participants, and they start it RIGHT away.

I've been focused on Tim here so far but on Bernard's side he's just. He speaks in doublespeak all the time. Like even when it's something he's upset about or has hurt him in the past he just keeps it in and hints at it because he trusts Tim blindly to understand because he's a detective and shit. Look at this mf he can't turn the layered meanings machine off he's even doing it in the Pride Special

THE PRIDE SPECIAL!! Metaphor loving mf... you're everything to me you funny bastard

So basically if this had been allowed to run its course...

Step 5 - Okay so we now Know that Bernard Doesn't Know that Tim Doesn't Know that Bernard Knows. what now

... Well, it would have been really fucking interesting!! I think Bernard would not have been happy to know he'd been so thoroughly misunderstood and underestimated, and I think Tim would have been very torn between his bat-training and what needed to be done to make things work between them.

Personally? I think that Tim would have learned that he doesn't need to be the Robin that he was before and that it was getting in the way of really knowing Bernard. At the same time that Bernard learned that his conception of Robin (and by extension Tim) as larger than life was getting in the way of knowing who Tim really was.

Step X - Reflections

I find myself, like... I keep coming back to these two. The build here is incredible, and subtle, and it's really a credit to the writing that I can just go back and panel by panel always find some new way that it was tightly written when looking for the panels for these writeups. Their interactions are layered, and each layer has something interesting going on. Really great use of (in the interim I learned the proper term for this!) delayed decoding! I really don't understand why people don't think Tim is interesting in this, too. He's out here being the second funniest mf in Gotham.

Unfortunately, having to end the run on Tim being rescued in costume by Bernard being the world's least subtle about Knowing, we kinda blew our chance to slowburn this in canon. Maybe a good canon divergent fanfic departing from before the last issue could do this justice, idk.

Such is comics! Hope this turns out to be good reference material for someone, at least.

Seeya!

[thehigherseekerastro]

Random Astrology Observations (Alternative Meanings Love Edition) 🤨❤️🤔

DISCLAIMER: I am in no way, shape or form a professional astrologer, modern or traditional.

I HAVE been studying astrology for a while now, and analysing charts available to me, as well as my own, and noticed a lot of the info you find online doesn't make sense in real life, because it is too reductive, stereotypical or lacks broader context. So I thought I'd share some of my personal observations to see if it resonates with anyone.

This is NOT the end all, be all. Apply it as it makes sense to you.

PS: I don't know how to edit posts, and this is my first Tumblr post, so it's not gonna look pretty.

**************************************************

The 10th House 🕰️

The 10H gets reduced to "career and work", but it goes much further than that. The 10th house represents your highest honors, which, in a capitalist modern world, will often be directly linked to your career success, but it's not the success that's built around the career. It's the other way around. It talks about the career that leads you to success. The main point is NOT working itself, but success. 10H will also describe your public image, your reputation, your public persona, your long-term goals, your social influence, your social status, your legacy and the image you wanna project.

(e.g.: your biggest legacy could have nothing to do with something that made you money in this life. It could have been starting a non-profit that changed lots of lives. Or you could become prestigious in your social circle for your personality, which presents you with opportunities in life that aren't directly connected to acquiring material things [because the 2H is the house of materials and possessions])

Going off of the first topic – 10H synastry, specially house overlays – does NOT mean workplace romance. In fact, your significant other may not even work or, if they do, may not even work in the same field as you, let alone be co-workers. Like I said, the 10H is much larger than "career", but also, career and work are not exactly the same thing. If they do happen to be involved in your career, it may have nothing to do with your workplace directly, but with your career in a general sense. So, instead of meeting at WORK, being co-workers, and all the reductive things people claim, you could meet them through your CAREER.

(e.g.: You work at an insurance company, but are studying to become a lawyer, and you happen to attend a conference related to the lawyer part of your ambitions, not your actual job, and there you meet your significant other./You work as a waitress, but your dream of becoming a model. So you attend an event to network with people in the modeling industry, and there you meet your significant other, but they just happen to be somebody's friend who got invited to go to the event, even though they themselves are not in the industry at all).

Since the 10H also rules your highest self, your "best case scenario", and your status and legacy, having 10H synastry with someone could simply mean they will change your life significantly, either positively or negatively. They will shift the foundations of how you are perceived and perceive yourself, and may even change your status in life. In that sense, the person who eventually becomes your spouse and the parent of your children could have 10H synastry with you. They will have changed your public status, as well as your legacy. Broaden your perspectives without thinking of keywords.

The 9th House 📖

A lot of astro observations are very Americanized/Euro-centric, and lack perspective and social and cultural context. The 9H is much broader than "foreign things". In fact, it's the most expansive house of all 12, so to reduce that "expansiveness" to foreign travel because it's big and wide is too simplistic, and doesn't take into account people whose realities simply do not include access or contact to foreign cultures and places. It COULD indicate foreign travel and cultures, but it will most likely be "foreign" in the context of abstract things, such as beliefs, philosophy and worldview. The "traveling" of the 9H also does NOT have to be literal, and could very often mean intellectual and moral, such as "traveling" through the acquiring of knowledge, or "traveling" through exploring new spiritual practices and teachings.

(e.g.: The 9H will talk of higher education, but that's not a reality for a large portion of the world. So, instead of thinking in terms of university, think more of "higher education" in terms of evolving studying of concepts and notions. In that regard, life experience is ALSO included in the 9H)

Going off of the previous topic – 9H placements do NOT immediately mean you will marry a foreigner, or somebody from a different race/ethnicity/culture, or even that you will definitely travel abroad and meet somebody there. Not only is the idea of just up and moving to another country like it's nothing wildly unrealistic, it centers itself in the easy access Americans and Europeans have to foreign travel. Most of the world outside of those places will either not have the financial means to make foreign travel that easily, nor will they have political access to it (such as a passport that allows them to travel to other countries with no restrictions). Most people will not ever even leave their country by the time they've reached life milestones like marriage, job and children. Not only that – but the extreme racial divide seen in the United States is a very particular and individual experience, only seen also in major European countries (so very Caucasian-centric). Most people will not be making huge deals about marrying somebody who's from Korea, or Africa, or Brazil, or India, as if they were a totally different type of species.

(So the whole ordeal about "you will marry someone from a different race/culture is bogus. Countries like Brazil have a VERY diverse population, yet, they are very seamlessly integrated, so being of black, white, asian, Arab descent is not relevant, as they will see themselves as "just Brazilians" living the same Brazilian experience over all, regardless of their ethnicity.)

Having 9H love placements (such as Venus, Mars or Jupiter, and Juno) or having 9H synastry with someone very likely will not indicate a foreigner or finding love/starting a relationship abroad. It will 9 times out of 10 indicate somebody who expands your horizons, somebody who makes you question things and seek deeper understanding of the world around you, somebody who challenges your mind and spirit, somebody who will expose you to new and inventive ways of seeing, understanding and interacting with the world. That COULD mean they do that because they come from a different country or cultural background. But it could also mean they just think and act very fundamentally different from YOUR personal culture, and will bring up topics that teach you new ways to approach life. Not to mention that it could just describe accessing different cultures THROUGH them.

(e.g.: You and your spouse may be from the very same country and very same race, but upon getting together, you two end up moving to an area that has a lot of foreigners in it, a large population of foreigners, or through your partner you become acquainted with mutual friends who come from a vastly different cultural background than your own, and that, in turn, expands your worldview as if you yourself had traveled to another country or learned about another culture directly./ Or, to put it in more plain terms, your partner may just be a very freaking smart and knowledgeable person who teaches you things you would only learn in college.)

Still, with that said, the basic repeated meanings you see online COULD also still apply here, for anyone, but specially if you are white and from a country from the Northern hemisphere, as those descriptions apply more to their individual realities.

The 6th House 🧹

The 6H deals with daily, repetitive, routine things, which is why it deals with work, health and caretaking, because those are repetitive, orderly, constant tasks.

(Just like 10H is a "career" house, but it is not necessarily a "money house", the 6H is a "work" house, but not necessarily a money house. The money houses are the 2H (which deals with money you earn yourself), the 8H (which deals with money your manage for or earn from other people's possessions, such as an inheritance or your spouse's money), and – to an extent – the 11H (since it deals with "struck of luck" moments and could indicate coming into unexpected money).

You are more likely to date a co-worker having 6H love placements or 6H synastry than you are with the 10H, because the 10H deals with CAREER, which is not necessarily your workplace itself (could be a side business you're trying to take off), while the 6H deals with WORK itself. Since the 6H deals with daily routines, and a co-worker is someone you see on a daily basis at work.

(Not to be confused with the business-related side of the 7H, which will talk of business partners or having a business with your partner. It's like: the 10H will have your partner RELATED to your career somehow, but maybe not directly. The 6H will have your partner be a co-worker, but not necessarily share your career goals and plans. The 7H MAY describe starting a business with your partner eventually.)

Health is another thing that may or may not be a key factor in your relationship, or even for a long time. You might have 6H synastry and health never becomes a theme of your connection. You might be dating for 5 years and health is never a theme, and then you get married and for most of your marriage health is still not a thing. But then, by the time you two are old, one of you may develop a condition and the other one becomes your caretaker. Or another aspect of the 6H that is not talked about is daily life with your children together. The 6H is not the house of children, but the routine of taking care of a child together night be influenced by the 6H synastry, depending on the sign its happening in.

The 11th House 🫂

The 11H is VERY underrated for romance, because it doesn't manifest as quickly as people think romance and passion should. But it is, in fact, an extremely powerful house for synastry, when combined with other romance-inducing aspects. The 11H deals with, amongst other things, friendship. You'll often find that having 11H overlays/synastry means a platonic relationship or, at the very best, one-sided, but that only happens if there are no other aspects pointing towards romance – HEALTHY romance.

(It's also important to note that 11H synastry is deeper than people think. Just because it's a social house doesn't mean it's a detached house. Houses and signs are not the same thing. Aquarius ruling the 11H and Aquarius being stereotypically described as emotionally detached does not mean 11H synastry is detached. On the contrary, the 11H is very deep because it is the house of hopes, life dreams and aspirations, so it will describe things we idealize in a very pure and hopeful way.)

With 11H synastry, specially moon, Venus, Mars and – sometimes, Sun, if it's a water sign –, there will be a very strong bond of friendship, regardless of other layers to that relationship. And who do we trust more, if not our friends? Those are people we are not related to by blood or law, who do not share our immediate environment, whom we have no obligation to whatsoever, but we choose to give them unopposed access to our private world. So with 11H synastry between lovers, there is a deep foundation of friendship, which means that if it ends badly, it will have a very painful effect on the psyche and heart, because it will feel like losing a lover AND a best friend.

(That means that 11H includes a very important component of TRUST, an aspect that is only talked about with the 4th and 8th houses, but is also present in the 11th. Both for comfortability and feeling of betrayal. Also, that intensity also comes from the fact that with 11H synastry people tend to project their hopes and dreams onto each other. Like thinking they are the best person ever, all-in-one, ticking all the boxes, lover AND friend... So if that breaks at some point, it can make people feel really stupid and embarrassed.)

Like I said, 11H synastry in romance doesn't play out as quickly as people think love should be, so it gets dismissed in the romance department. But the 11H is a Saturn house. It takes time, and it needs structure. It means that friendship will ALWAYS come before romance. Now, does that mean that people will always be friends-to-lovers? No. They might start off as lovers, but they won't reach the potential of their intimacy until there's a well-established foundation of camaraderie and friendship, and once they do, that bond becomes very unbreakable, because they become partners in crime and each other's favorite person. IF IT'S IN A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP WITH OTHER ROMANCE ASPECTS.

General Things ✨

ASTROLOGY is NOT MAGIC. It will not cause anything to happen in your life. Don't just rely on placements and aspects. It means absolutely NOTHING if you got 4H synastry with the one you love, but you yourself have problematic 4H/moon aspects in your natal chart that you do nothing to work on (and vice versa). That 4H synastry could turn toxic at the snap of a finger, and no amount of "comfort" is gonna prevent it. If you can't process your emotions well, you could date all the Cancers you want, or you could be a cancer yourself, you WILL NOT engage emotionally in a healthy way. You can't give nor receive something you don't have or don't understand. So, instead, learn about the makeup of your charts, but then use it as a study to improve yourselves, not just to think you will magically live in a Disney movie happily ever after just because his Venus falls in your 4H.

Astrology is not a hurricane. Not all things are happening at the same time all the time at all times, as of they were things flying around in a chaotic hurricane. The energies of your individual natal charts, as well as the energies of your synastry will play out in their own time, and may play out slowly, over time. Like house overlays, for example. One particular aspect of the 2H may play out at the beginning of the relationship, but if you eventually get married, another side of the 2H synastry may be unlocked. Or your husband could have an specific placement for his love life that will not be activated until he gets married, which means that for the entire time you are just dating, those things will not be happening. As with all things in life, astrology follows its natural course, and develops and changes over time.

Astrology does not bless or doom a relationship. It won't tell you whether you can/should or not be with someone. It doesn't MAKE YOU do anything. However, for the relationships that end in catastrophe, you can always go back and check the synastry/composite, and it will probably be obvious there, you just couldn't see it before. With that I don't mean to go out planing your life and connections around astrology, because that's very impractical, unrealistic and low-key immature, as people are ALWAYS growing and maturing. But I AM saying that if you are in a relationship that feels draining, toxic, abusive, unstable 24/7... trust the synastry, because you're probably trying to force something that is very clearly laid out for you, and that ONE or two nice aspects or placements are not gonna save you from obvious ruin. BE RATIONAL.

**************************************************

That's it! Thank you if you've read it this far!

I might have come off a bit harsh (I hope I haven't), but I promise I'm nice lol.

Hopefully this resonates, as well as helps somebody understand a bit more. This was my first post, so it's a bit clumsy, but do let me know if you'd like me to share some more thoughts on astrology, and I might do another round.

MASTER LIST

[sw1ft-sniff]

So I saw a post talking about kai getting/having a centipede tattoo after monstrosity. I am here to say I fully agree with that hc and I have more info I want to share.

So centipede tattoos they have a lot of symbolism,

These symbolic points all have a correspondence to Kai as a person.

Hard working - Kai through out his whole life has worked hard, and worked even harder to get through the Land of Monsters and back to his family.

Solitude - being alone in the Land of Monsters, no one he truely knows and trusts there with him.

Wisdom - Over the series Kai grows and reflects learning from his family and experiences. During Monstrosity Kai would have probably done some self reflecting on his life and grown as a person. Cause like "what if he died and he never saw his family again" would lead to some heavy and dark thoughts.

Power - physically and mentally. He has his elemental power, which is literal power. His emotions and state of mind drive his will to live. During Monstrosity, the fact he got through it and presumably still mentally stable, displays his determination to get home. His power

Good luck - I'd says it's really lucky that Kai met two characters that have had past relations to fire masters (assuming that's a good thing) and they're both experts on surviving there from what we know.

Change - A lot of change has happened through out Kai's life, changing as a person or the world around him changing. Kai had to change to survive the Land of Monsters, and feeding into the bug kai hcs. Kai physically changed/transformed into something else to survive monstrosity.

All these points just make sense for kai, all aligning with him as a person and I just think it makes the tattoo even more meaningful from my perspective.

Now my little convo thoughts on how nya asking about the tattoo would go.

Nya: Kai, why do you have a giant ass centipede tattoo on your back?

Kai: *Choaks on the water he was sipping cause he genuinely forgot he had that tattoo even though he literally transforms into a centipede hybrid thing and that tattoo what is around when he isnt Centipede Kai tm*

Kai: Oh it's just something I got after the merge, I think centipedes are cool, the only cool bug. It's also apparently it's symbolic for change or something like that.?

Nya: uh huh, I guess that makes sense, well it's sick as hell. Complements to the artist.

Kai: *internally screaming at himself because he literally didn't choose to get the tattoo he just got it cause "you cannot escape the land of monsters without becoming a monsters yourself"*

[notbecauseofvictories]

Just saw your post about graphic novels that intrigued you and it intrigued me too. Would you mind sharing which graphic novels have you read that you'd recommend or that affected you in interesting ways? Thank you!

When it comes to graphic novels, I tend to prefer the slightly idiosyncratic, and definitely adult. While I did like The Night Eaters, and Something Is Killing the Children (my first experience really dipping my toe in...) I learned very quickly that (a) I can't do anything with even a whiff of YA, and (b) series are not my forte. But that's okay, because this space also has a lot of artists writing and illustrating for adults, really putting the "novel" in "graphic novel."

I've talked before about Junji Ito and Alison Bechdel, so I won't repeat myself---though I do still love Bechdel's work with the unspoken, prickly edges of things; I think very fondly of that weekend I spent reading badly-translated jpegs of Ito's work, the sense of destabilization and disorientation it left me with.

A list of some other works that stand out, in no particular order:

The Third Person, by Emma Grove, which delves into the experience of someone with multiple identities, each with its own relationship to gender. Especially if you're about to read Catriona Ward's The Last House on Needless Street for book club, I think this should be a required pairing.

If you're looking for something that captures the mundane struggle of making a life (similar to Will McPhail’s In.) there are lots of options! I'd recommend Roaming, by Jillian and Mariko Tamaki, or maybe It's Lonely at the Centre of the Earth, by Zoe Thorogood. I think Roaming might be stronger as a narrative, but It's Lonely is an imaginal and imaginative chronicle of that struggle to make a life, make art---though it didn't work for me as a narrative, the visuals stand out to me as beautiful, surreal in exactly the way I like.

I liked The Underwater Welder, by Jeff Lemire, for very similar reasons---the bits about a son trying to grapple with the legacy his alcoholic, semi-neglectful father didn't land, but when the narrator dives deep into the bay and encounters an abandoned ghost town where his own used to be? That was haunting.

If you enjoy Bechdel and Grove's work, then Julia Wertz's Impossible People is similarly a delight, and grapples thoughtfully with the narrator's alcoholism; it just didn't quite land for me in the way I wanted it to.

(Is this where I admit that I did like Blink, by Christopher Sebela et al? It's very old school scifi and almost cinematic in its approach, makes very few apologies for it, but the art is so, so divine.)

One of the most idiosyncratic was Paying for It by Chester Brown; an illustrated manifesto about the values of paying for sex, and the lives of the sex workers the narrator encounters. Honestly the most interesting part of this one was the fact that Brown has clearly thought about this subject a lot, and talked to everyone in his life about it. Some of the afterwords aren't from him---they're from his friends, who watched this from the outside, and share their perspective on how Brown has chosen or defends his approach to sex.

The even better news is that there are lots of DIY artists in this space as well! I have my own favorites close to home, plus I bought multiple copies of the Kentucky Route Zero fanzine, and I was lucky enough to snag some of the work offered as part of the Shortbox Comics Fair.

In particular I loved Stevie B.'s Dr. Limos Plays God (I'm a sucker for a clone identity crisis!), Otava Heikkila's Home by the Rotting Sea (which has some very fun Octavia Butler echoes), Narsid's Last Crane (lovely, and quite sad), and also Ver's Sacred Bodies, which has the dubious distinction of making me think "this better not awaken anything in me" for the first time since Crimes of the Future.

All this to say...graphic novels are neat, I enjoy them, but it's a bit like watching a movie with subtitles. I mostly understand what's going on, but I think I'm missing some of the finer shades and nuances that would take my experience to the next level.

[chaoschaoswriting]

Scottish Folklore Resources

Since its spooky season, I thought I'd share this list of short posts about Scottish folklore creatures for anyone seeking inspiration. These posts are mostly based on what I have heard as someone who grew up in central Scotland, so please keep in mind that they may differ slightly from other stories you might here; folklore is very much a living oral tradition and there are usually a few iterations of anything floating about.

With that said, I did do some background research to offer other perspective and fact check my memory as much as one can when dealing with this kind of topic!

The Baobhan Sìth

Cat Sìth

Cù Sìth

Red Caps

The Wulver

[dee-the-red-witch]

…a lot of folks just see themselves in the mirror. Before I came out and started my transition, I mostly saw static- I'd gotten really good at making my brain just tune out what I was feeling about what I was seeing. But once I stopped hiding from myself? The litany my brain went through every time I saw my own face was way too loud and clear.

Chin too wide. Forehead too big. Brow ridge is massive, you have to keep your eyebrows constantly raised just help hide it. Where's your upper lip? It doesn't matter if that's been your hairline from birth, that fivehead is terrible.

And more. It was even worse before I'd started laser for my facial hair and found a stylist that does amazing work reshaping my eyebrows. And none of it is vanity. It's just my brain doing it's own best to hurt itself with all the reminders of a puberty that went in the wrong direction. Of the fact that I wasn't a girl.

And I want to point out something- all these features I've listed? They're all present in cis women. Gorgeous cis women. There's nothing inherently male about any of these. Hells, on a good day, I pass as a woman in public without much issue, which is something I never thought would happen.

But this isn't about passing. It also isn't about ultimately going stealth and hiding the fact that I'm trans. I fully intend to stay loud about that for the rest of my life. It's about being able to look in the mirror and not want to scream about everything that doesn't match what's in my head at all. It's about making that list shut up. I can see past it sometimes. Just sometimes. But that's why the second of these two surgeries I'm having needs to happen. So I can see it more often. So I can be myself, without the horror movie litany in my head.

And the fix for it? In my case it's the following, since I didn't want to deal with implants or fillers. Bone reduction in the chin and brow- make the former narrower and reduce the brow ridge entirely. Adjust the upper lip with a slight pull upwards, done just under the nose. Since my skin's going to be loose from the removed bone, use it to pull things a bit further by bringing my hairline forward and down a touch. That';s it. slight adjustments that'll leave my face looking like I got hit by a truck for the first six months of recovery, but afterwards, a face more like what I expect to see in the mirror.

And yes, this post is happening because GFM once again reminds me to give detail and insight about the medical needs I need covered to my audience. And for those of you unfamiliar, maybe it at least gives some perspective. I don't think they quite knew what they were asking for with these particular cases, and I'm hoping I didn't just horrify the lot of you with this. But when it comes to asking 'why I need to do this'? This is part of it. Making some of my life that much less of a struggle.

Anyways, thanks for taking the time on reading through this one if you've gotten this far. If you can, please, again, share this fundraiser around- I've got a long way to go still, but I'm hoping I'll be able to make it.

137 days to go.

[little-one-eyed-monsters]

A bit late but I just saw your post on BKPP, can I ask what makes you think they’re a couple irl too? It seems they’re very adamant on stating (in interviews and press cons) that it’s platonic between them and yes that’s arguably the right choice for their careers but they could also take the ‘maybe, maybe not’/vague and ambiguous route if they wanted to right. Would love to know your thoughts, thanks!

Hello friend! 😊 thank you for asking this. And please know that this is just my personal, very delulu opinion. We are all free to ship and believe whoever we wish, so long as we do it respectfully (so ship away Mandee and GMMTV fans 😍 shipping can actually be really fun so long as we respect the actors' boundaries). If you have other ships that you believe are true IRL, send your manifestos and truths my way, I'd love to see them 😊 (and fangirl along with you).

Okay so anon, I'll start with the inane and delulu answer first before I move on to the logical one (sorry!) 😅

Delulu answer is: THE RINGS!!!

No, not matching rings gifted to them by fans. Not rings given by a sponsor. Not even jewelry they gifted to each other during a birthday or a special event like a graduation etc. These were personalized, one-of-a-kind rings given in the most dramatic way, on a specific day that holds no national holiday or life event, and no significance to the fandom. A day special only to the couple. And they both broke down HEAVILY when they received it, as if owning these rings held more meaning than we could ever fathom.

Ya' know, kinda like:

I TOLD YOU THIS WAS A DELULU ANSWER. What do you mean I'm equating DaouOffroad and BKPP to a literal ENGAGED couple? Am I out of pocket?

Yes. Yes I am.

So to give my blog back some of its street cred (man these asks are putting me in so much hot water) 😅...

Logical answer: the Joint FAMILY-RUN Companies

But Yinwar also has a jo--- shush, please my friend. I LOVE YINWAR. I LOVE THEM IN MY BONES. But their company was founded as a corporation, with two other co-investors (one who already left, and one removed because he proved to be a literal demon), with their respective managers and Dee Hup House also owning shares in the company. It's a corporation. YinWar also has individual merch lines, and individual management teams.

I'M NOT SAYING THERE ISN'T A POSSIBILITY THEY'RE NOT A COUPLE, okay? In fact, please prove me wrong YinWar, please please please. Release your truly unhinged selves by a thousand percent and just announce your relationship on a random Tuesday.

ANYWAY...

BKPP's companies-- the individual ones and two other joint companies (BKPP Entertainment and Caremate)-- are JOINT FAMILY ventures, with one parent from each half of the ship actually co-owning, and the other parent managing. I thought this only applied to their joint companies, which would make sense as a branded pair. But from my research, I found out that Billkin's parents actually also serve top positions in PP Krit's solo company, and vice versa. These parents and family members help out at solo events, even when their actual son isn't involved in the activity.

This makes NO SENSE from a business perspective, because if the branded pair goes under, you'd want to make sure that your son, and not their partner, would get the most financial benefit from the ship. The joint company is par for the course at an even 50-50 split. But putting your son's branded pair partner and their family in the INDIVIDUAL company, is just asking for financial and legal trouble. Even if they were the bestest best of friends in the whole wide world, should the ship sink, that would be a logistical nightmare, especially considering it's your son's name on the company, not his partner.

Even best friends don't do this btw. Business partners co-own companies yes, but they don't usually intertwine extended familial involvement in equal and specific terms. The families' functions and management capacities are usually kept within strict and specific boundaries, per legal advice, to ensure smoother removals or buyouts down the line. This is especially applicable for media companies that usually require multiple partnerships with external brands and affiliates. (Not to get too technical up in here)

To have such deep involvement within each others' solo companies, while venturing into two more joint companies-- these can only mean two things: 1) these people are CONFIDENT that the branded pair will last, hence a small to limited possibility of a logistic meltdown, and 2) these people are particularly invested in ensuring not just their solo success, but their PARTNER's success as well.

I don't see that with other branded pairs at all, not even the ones under the same company and already under the same management. After all, why involve your actual PARENTS and families into this if the ship could go kaput any second? Not even branded pairs with OffGun or MaxNat's longevities are guaranteed, and they KNOW that. The media industry is fickle. You have to invest in the brand yes, but also yourself, too.

BKPP, and their families must believe this is a forever deal, to gamble so much money on JOINT success. Aside from being bound by blood, what's a more lasting partnership in this world than marriage (ideally)?

With another litmus category added to my test for IRL couples, in my opinion, this is as logical a method to check for your ship's autheticity as any other. Thanks for the ask, this one was so fun 🥰

[makialene]

An Analysis/Breakdown of Alien Stage Round 6

I've seen a couple of people give their interpretations of this round, so I figured I'd share my own thoughts. I wanted to specifically focus on how this develops IvanTill's relationship with each other, specifically in a ship context.

We start with Tills verse, so naturally we get his perspective first. The first flashback scene we get (beyond the intro) is of Till in the bar with Urak (his guardian), being forced to sing "My Clematis" but refusing. To punish Till for disobeying, alongside throwing something at Till, he forces Till to look at a newspaper about how Mizi is missing, deliberately harassing him because he knows how important Mizi is to Till. A few seconds later, we cut to a clip of Ivan fighting the Aliens in the bar off of Till.

After this, the next time we see this scene, it is Till lying on Urak's lap, reaching out into the distance. There we see Mizi, dressed in all white like a Guardian Angel, even though Ivan is the one who saves him here.

What this scene is telling us as an audience is that Till sees Mizi, and only Mizi. Despite the fact that Ivan is physically present in that moment AND the one who actually saves him, Till doesn't see Ivan. He just sees Mizi.

"Seeing" people is used as a metaphor for love a lot in Alien Stage, ESPECIALLY with IvanTill. We see this a lot with their (usually Ivan's) actions, but it's a bit more explicit in the song itself that they're singing

Cue lyrics like: "네 눈에 날 녹여주길//Dissolve me in your gaze" "읽어줘 날//Read my soul" "지금 나의 상처를 봐줘 지금 나를 치유해줘//Notice my pain And mend me right now" And, of course, most explicitly: "날 보는 네 눈동자에 마셔줘 날//In your gaze where I'm seen Consume me"

"Being seen" is symbolic of love in this world, at least for IvanTill. The previous scene establishes that, despite how desperately Ivan wants it, Till only "sees" Mizi. This is a very important establishing scene for setting up where IvanTill is as a relationship BEFORE the events of Round 6. In order to shift a dynamic, we need to know where we stand originally. Ivan "sees" Till, but Till does not "see" Ivan.

We now switch to Ivans verse and perspective. We start by seeing a continuation of the previous flashback from Ivans perspective, where he approaches an unconscious Till. He removes Till's… collar? gag? and leans over him, looking at him. Here is another moment where Ivan "sees" Till, and Till is unable to "see" Ivan.

Important note here: if you look at Ivan's eyes, you can see a slight highlight towards the bottom. This is a visual representation of "love" in IvanTill. Till, notably, does not have any highlights in his eyes while singing, furthering the notion that at this point in time, he only "sees" Mizi. The video even zooms in on Ivan's eyes, showing the highlights in greater detail to emphasize this to the viewer.\

We then cut back to Ivan singing on stage, and he has highlights in his eyes. Even though he isn't LITERALLY looking at Till in this moment, the song is for him. He's thinking of Till, and this is how the art shows us that he can "see" him.

We then cut to another flashback, but this is of another scene. This scene starts off by Ivan stepping on some flowers and Till attacking him for it, likely because, as we know, Mizi adores said flowers (once again, establishing Till's affection for Mizi). However, it s important to note that the reason Ivan did this wasn't to upset Till at all- it was to protect him.

A popular fan theory that got confirmed canon with the art book was that the artificial flowers were actually cameras, so that the Aliens could monitor the children in Anakt Garden. We have to assume that Ivan knows this, as we are shown time and time again that Ivan seems to know more about the facility they're in than the rest of the cast. He finds the hidden Alien that they mess with, he is able to break himself and Till out (before Till runs back for Mizi), etc. Given this, he is likely stopping on the flowers to protect Till from the Aliens.

Of course, Till doesn't know this and (another theme of IvanTill being miscommunication) Ivan, in all his wisdom, doesn't tell Till- he just gets attacked. And even then, despite fighting back in self defense, Ivan doesn't truly mind what's happening. He's surprised, sure, but Till is looking at him, and that's all he wants.

We can see in the scene how Ivan's initial reaction is surprise rather than anger, how he doesn't seem to enjoy retaliating, and the joy he feels at being seen. (Notice: Highlights in his eyes when Till first attacks him, no highlights when he's fighting back, highlights again after the fight is over)

Not to stay on eye highlights for too long but the scene immediately following that we get THIS visual: Ivan, with highlights in his eyes, looking at Till; and Till, with highlights in his eyes, distinctly not looking at Ivan. Vivinos, you way at visually conveying unrequited love... I envy you

The next scene I want to discuss is a few seconds later, where Till shows up to what appears to be a cafeteria with a cut on his face. We can assume this came from treatment of the Aliens, Urak or otherwise. Ivan gets up from his seat to come over and touch the cut on Till's face. Till, caught off guard, reacts harshly by pushing him away. While this is the scene I'm least sure of, I saw this scene as an indirect confession of Ivan's feelings. It's meant to be a conversation; he's trying to tell Till that he sees him and his pain (this scene comes not long after the lyrics "지금 나의 상처를 봐줘//Notice my pain"). Till, of course, doesn't understand, and pushes him and then looks away- which Ivan quietly accepts as a rejection. (and then he licks Till's blood because he's a Freak idk).

This goes along with their theme of miscommunication: Ivan is constantly "confessing" indirectly- trying to tell Till that he sees him and in turn begging Till to do the same, but Till cannot understand what Ivan is doing, so he continues to "reject" him. This also somewhat addresses why Till has not confronted his subconscious feelings for Ivan- alongside a myriad of other reasons, Till does not truly understand what Ivan's feelings for him are.

There is the possibility that this is at least partially internalized homophobia. While we may not know for sure what the "laws" surrounding homosexuality are in this universe (if humans are even legally allowed to love/get married), what we DO know from the comic "The True Face" is that at the very least, it is a heteronormative society. When Mizi talks to The Worst Guy Ever, he isn't threatened by Sua at all; he does, however, see Till as a rival, despite Mizi having no romantic interest in him.

I don't think it's unreasonable for Till to ignore any potential feelings he may have had for Ivan growing up, because it's honestly unlikely he realized what they were at the time. It's not like Ivan was explaining himself well.

And now, of course, we have to get to the iconic kiss scene and what the hell Ivan is actually trying to do there.

What sparks Ivan to act is Till's own self-sacrifice. He gives up and stops singing. Forfeits. Till finally comes to terms with dying; it's not like he has Mizi anymore, so what's the point? and he gives up. Fortunately, or unfortunately, for him, Ivan cannot live without him. Ivan knows this to be true. He also believes that Till doesn't care about him and, therefore, will be fine without him, so he takes action to make sure he survives.

Not to go back to the highlights in their eyes, but they're IMPORANT and SYMBOLIC and I love body language in this show so I'm doing it. When Ivan approaches Till, Till doesn't have any light in his eyes, until he LOOKS AT IVAN AND THE APPEAR FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE THE SONG STARTED. His eyes also DILATE. Whether or not Till can acknowledge his love for Ivan is one thing, but it is clear that he absolutely does harbor affection for him.

I think it is also important to note that Ivan DOESN'T have any highlights in his eyes. Ivan doesn't like what he's about to do here.

First, I am going to break down the actual scene itself and what we can see from that, then why I think Ivan chose to do this.

First, let's look at the two's reaction to the kiss. Till's is most obvious: he's confused and panicked. Mere seconds ago, he decided to give up and die, and just as he's accepted his own death, Ivan is kissing him for reasons he couldn't begin to fathom. We have to remember that at this point, Ivan has done a terrible job of actually conveying his feelings like a normal person. Till is aware that Ivan feels something for him- but it's unlikely he processed the true extent of it. So now, Till must deal with the shock of his friend kissing him ON TOP of the shock of not being dead when in his mind he very much should be.

So, naturally, he panics and pushes away. He doesn't understand what Ivan is doing, doesn't understand why he would be doing it, and this is interrupting his plans. Till was ready to die, and Ivan is actively preventing that.

From the facial expressions we see, it seems like Till is much more caught off guard and confused/panicked in this moment than truly distressed at the fact that Ivan is kissing him. We, as the audience, know he has subconscious feelings for Ivan, which is likely why his reaction is more panic and confusion instead of disgust.

We also have to look at Ivan's reaction. It would be natural for him to be excited, given that he finally gets the opportunity to kiss the person he's in love with, but that's not what we see on his face at all. His face is very... neutral. Focused. He isn't enjoying the kiss at all. We've seen Ivan when he's happy because of Till, like in the scene where they fight and Till finally looks at him. Till may be looking at him, but Ivan is not happy. This isn't what he wants.

Ivan is stronger than Till, which we know from their fight but also the sheer size difference between the two. There was plenty of forced proximity, Ivan had multiple opportunities to kiss Till before, but he never did. Why? Because he needs Till to want it. Ivan has no desire to force a relationship onto Till. As much as it hurts, he respects their relationship as being nonromantic and chooses to never cross that boundary because he does not want to hurt Till. Ivan is crossing his own boundaries by doing this, and is miserable for it. There is only tragedy for him in this kiss: he finally gets to kiss his love but it couldn't be further from how he wanted it.

Till's eyes also have highlights; his eyes even soften once Ivan finishes kissing him, as if he had finally processed at least a portion of his feelings, but now, Ivan is the one not looking at him. His eyes are away, and there are no highlights.

Now: why did Ivan do this? I think he had two reasons, personally. The primary one is obvious: save Till. Till had stopped singing, which would cause him to lose if Ivan did not act. Ivan needs a way to quickly distract the audience from what Till has done, so what does he do?

Well, what he's always done. He plays to the audience. One of Ivan's greatest strengths in Alien Stage is his ability to see Alien Stage for what it is: a show. This is entertainment for the aliens. So, he plays into it. We've seen this a bit before in the previous episode, Top 3. This is where we get an image of the main four walking and see Till flicking off the aliens. More importantly, though, we see Ivan making a heart towards his fans. This isn't him being ignorant- he knows exactly where he stands among the Alien- he is just also aware of the genre of the show he's on. The aliens want an idol; he can do that. He's good at it, too. In Top 3, we learn that despite all of Luka's popularity, Ivan is actually on top of the alien fandom's popularity poll. Till fights his fans, it makes sense that he isn't popular. Luka is pretty neutral, doing enough to get by with a slightly higher quality of life but ultimately being pretty docile. Ivan, though? Ivan plays to the fans. It gives him a safety net.

This is one of the reasons I believe he chose to kiss Till. He took a very bold action that he knew would captivate the alien audience, immediately distracting them from the fact that Till had lost by no longer singing. In this regard, he is successful.

However, I think there is another, more personal reason he kissed Till- and no, it's not because of his feelings for him. I think he wanted to guarantee that Till would not miss him.

Let's go back a bit.

A while ago, Vivino's posted a comic and FOR THE LIFE OF ME I cannot find a translated version, but, in summary, Ivan mocks Sua for her plan to die for Mizi, saying all she will do is traumatize Mizi and calling her selfish for that.

It is because of this comic that I think Ivan wants to make sure that Till does not remember him fondly. He's attempting to be selfless- a moment of discomfort for Till, so he can "confess" and have Till reject him as he always has. Till does not want him, Ivan is sure, so when he does something explicitly romantic, Ivan is sure Till will hate him for it. Then, Ivan can die at least knowing that Till won't grieve the way Mizi does (did- he doesn't know if she's even alive by this point).

However, this backfires. Till pushes back initially, but I don't think we're meant to take that scene as a full rejection, especially not with how Round 7 takes it. We know Luka uses people that you love to manipulate you when singing against a person, and so, the natural choice here is Mizi. We know Till loves Mizi, throughout the entire series, he has shown his love for her. But, that's not who Vivino's chooses to have Luka mimic- he mimics Ivan. Because, and now Till has realized it, Till loves Ivan. If Luka wanted to choose someone Till hated, he would've chosen on of the Aliens, who Till has much more negative associations with, but he chooses love instead. Love to catch people off guard and mourn.

Back to the remainder of the round. The next thing we see, after Till's eyes briefly soften, is Ivan grabbing Till by the neck and pushing him away before pulling him back for a moment, as he glances at the scoreboard. There, he confirms that Till has beaten him, and his eyes have highlights once again. This is where we see him kiss Tiff, briefly, softly, a kiss Till doesn't reject at all. This kiss was real, one last selfish desire to make his feelings known genuinely, unlike the show he had to put on earlier. But, Ivan doesn't wait for true reciprocation- he knows Till won't give him that. So, he pushes Till away once again and "chokes" him.

Not that I believe Ivan was actually choking him. His hands are placed on the side of Till's throat rather than the windpipe, and instead of struggling against him, Till simply closes his eyes and accepts whatever happens to him (ANOTHER example of Till struggling to look at Ivan). There are also no marks on Till's neck and he imediately snaps back to alert when Ivan falls to the ground, so while the "choke" may have been uncomfortable, I don't believe Till's life was in any danger (from that specifically).

As Ivan chokes Till, he looks similar to how he did when he was kissing him: cold and calculating. Till is supposed to live, sure, but he did decide to forfeit- so Ivan is going to make sure Till survives.

I can't show this in a still image, but I also noticed how Ivan's hands shake and his eyes pulse as he does this. I think he wants to believe this is the right thing, because he's not sure what else to do, and not sure what it means if this isn't, but at the end of the day, he's scared.

Then there's the moment when he coughs up blood and allows himself to finally relax. He's going to die, which means Till is going to live. His plan worked. We see him process this, and his face shifts from this cold version of himself to an expression of utter love for Till (and you'll never guess what. eye highlights came back).

As he falls, Till's eyes snap open, and we see him willingly look at Ivan for the first time, all too late. Now, Till is beginning to process what this all means and how he feels about it. It's sublte, but as he looks at Ivan, there's a shine in his eyes as well.

And, Ivan falls, but he falls happily. Till lived, and he finally looked at him. He finally SAW Ivan. We watch Ivan fall, lifeless, but the very last frame we get of him before he hits the ground is, you guessed it, another close-up on his eyes to show the eye highlights. He died seen, so he can be happy.

Unfortunately, his death is selfish, alongside Sua's. In Alien Stage, selflessness and sacrifice are tied to selfishness. Ivan attempts to be selfless here and not traumatize Till, but he doesn't account for the possibility of Till reciprocating his feelings in any capacity. I'm not sure how to end this exactly LMAO. Anyway, I think it's a tragedy, but it also makes an interesting point about how we have a limited time to work through our feelings. If you read through this whole thing, you should follow me so we can be alien stage brainrot buddies

[avelera]

Let's Play: What's Wrong with this Sculpture?

Following in the theme of sharing astonishing moments of ancient sculpture pedantry here on Tumblr, based on my brief undergraduate stint as a T.A of ancient art history, I thought I'd share one of my other proudest moments of being an absolutely insufferable know-it-all about ancient sculptures.

In the process, I hope I can also share some of the sort of largely useless (from a practical perspective) information that Tumblr tends to glory in, so buckle up buttercups.

This question was posed to me on a walking tour of the Capitoline Museum in my ancient art history class while I was living abroad. Our professor, a delightfully curmudgeonly Belgian, stopped in front and asked us to figure out why this sculpture is just plain wrong.

I intend to walk you through the process of how I got the right answer and, after gaining my teacher's rare approval, glowed with enough serotonin to power a small nuclear reactor.

So, let's return to the original question: what is wrong with this sculpture?

Because if you are truly eagle-eyed you should be able to spot what very famous sculpture this actually is, before an overly imaginative Frenchman brought it back wrong.

Hint #1: It was incorrectly restored.

Look closely at the the difference of the patina, or color of the stone. It's a bit hard to tell in this photo, but the head was added later. It's a paler white than the core of the torso, which is what we have of the original sculpture.

Hint #2: It was incorrectly restored in the 18th century by a Frenchman (Pierre-Étienne Monnot) who made some, shall we say, creative interpretations of what's going on here.

You can tell it's by an 18th c. Frenchman because the facial features are so delicate. Ancient statues tend to have less narrow and delicate chins and noses. In general, that is a dead giveaway when something is 18th century French vs. Ancient Greek or Roman.

Here's a good example. The first sculpture is 18th c. French, the second is the famous Venus de Milo. Note her blockier chin and less delicate features. So in the future, you can tell these sort of later additions to Greek or Roman sculptures if they added a new head because 17-19th century sculptors in Europe had tools (like finer drill tips) and tastes (beauty standards that favored more delicate men and women) that led to a pronounced difference in the faces.

Hint #3: Check out the anatomy of his lower shoulder. That's another addition, that arm should not be coming straight out of a torso where the muscle, if you look closely, is turned inward.

Seriously, that looks painful.

Hint #4: The sword he's holding up is just total nonsense for the Roman era. I mean, the restoration makes no secret of the fact that this sword is a later addition, but it's also just an absolute nonsense sword with its silly little curved cross guard. This Frenchman literally just made it up.

Here's an ancient sculpture with a sword in it that actually looks right:

From the Ludovisi Gaul, a famous Hellenistic Baroque work of Greek sculpture. Note the much blockier sword though I will admit, it could be a later addition, I don't know for 100% certain, but I'm pretty sure it's the original. Regardless, it fits the sculpture much better and let me add that sword I'm criticizing is completely made up for the sculpture we're talking about and is not there in the original sculpture that was incorrectly restored.

Ok, so those are all the hints.

Look closely at the body of the first sculpture. Cut away the arms that are not connected to the body correctly, the sword that shouldn't be there, the face that was far too delicate. When you separate those later additions out, can you tell me what sculpture that actually is?

Because here is the reveal!

The Discus Thrower, aka, the Discobolus by Myron.

The French restorationist got carried away by his own imagination, saw a twisted torso and thought it could only possibly be a warrior in the midst of twisting around to fend off a blow, not an athlete in the midst of a demonstration of skill. It's a martial, fanciful read that completely misinterpreted the subject.

This is why most restoration today employs a much lighter touch, rather than trying to reattach pieces incorrectly, they tend to just outline where the missing pieces are with a light sketch of an educated guess of what might have actually been there. Faulty restorations like the Capitoline Discobolus is one reason for this modern stylistic principle when it comes to restoration work.

When my professor asked us to identify the correct original sculpture that day on the museum tour, it was the sword that pinged me as wrong first, but zeroing in on the core of the sculpture, the torso, is what revealed the true statue underneath.

This notoriously difficult to please professor was very proud when I blurted out, "It's the Discus Thrower!" and the high-octane serotonin I got from his approval probably could have propelled me into the sun that day, and brought to you Yet Another Moment of Ancient Sculpture Pedantry.

[eatmeandbirthmeagain]

hello there! before i begin, allow me to express how much i love your work! i've only recently come across the KoH fandom, and your writing has kept me, say, well provided for with all the reader x king baldwin fics and headcanons HEHE. so yes, thank you for the work that you do. <3333 as for my request, it was inspired by a song (the dream academy's version of "please, please, please let me get what i want", with the original by the smiths). i was thinking that it's mainly from king baldwin's perspective, wherein he's already in acceptance of his fate due to his leprosy. so that consumes most of his thoughts, only driven by his responsibility as king to keep moving. but he's not actually living, if you catch my drift. like, he has this "if death takes me now, i'll let it" sort of mentality. but then he meets reader (i'll leave as to how they met and eventually got closer up to you ^^) and his entire world changes drastically. met with this sudden change (and the newfound will to live) which begins to conflict with his time quickly running up, he prays fervently one night, begging that he will be given a second chance, to be able to spend the rest of his life with reader (hence, the song ^^). i was thinking that this is primarily angst, but if fluff will be added to it, that would be a wonderful addition too ^^

i hope this was comprehensible enough. again, thank you so much! i'd love to see how you'll interpret this in your writing! i simply can't wait ><

♧ Please Let Me Get What I Want - King Baldwin x Reader ♧

♧ Angst ♧

A/N: Hello Sheedle!! Thank you so much for this beautiful request, along with your constant love and support. Your words really mean the world to me 🫶. I hope this is what you had in mind for the fic! As always, this is based on the film Kingdom Of Heaven, not the real historical figures. Enjoy!

PS: THE IMAGE I USED FOR THIS FIC IS MF PERFECT CAN WE APPRICIATE THAT FOR A MINNUTE

TW: Leprosy

As the sun began to peak above the horizon line in the distance, the streets came alive, signifying a new day in Jerusalem.

The sunlight crept across the stone floor of the royal chambers until it reached the large, plush bed where the king of Jerusalem slept soundly. Baldwin’s eyes blinked open at the feeling of warmth on his face.

For just a moment, he was at peace. His body didn't hurt and he felt no pain. But this moment did not last long as the dull ache began to spread around his body once again.

Baldwin groaned and turned over onto his back as he came awake slowly. He stared blankly up at the ceiling. The same ceiling he had stared at so many times before.

Sleep was the only escape now. The only time he didn't feel weak or tired was when he lay in bed after a long day, finally getting some time to himself.

But in actual fact, he didn't want time to himself. What Baldwin wanted more than anything was a wife. But not just a wife, a companion.

He often thought about this and had come to the conclusion that it would never happen. No woman in the kingdom would agree to marry a leper. Certainly not any sane woman at least.

Someone who he could share his deepest, innermost thoughts with.

Someone who could show him love.

Someone who he could love in return.

As he lay in bed once again awaiting the arrival of the physicians to clean his wounds, Baldwin let this thought consume him once again.

He often pretended he had a wife. Not obviously though, just subtle little things that gave the illusion of a woman's comfort.

Baldwin turned his head to the pile of pillows that lay on the other side of his double bed and sighed. Every night, he would stack the decorative pillows that adorned his bed for aesthetic purposes beside him and lay on his side, just right so it felt like somebody was holding him.

If he closed his eyes and imagined hard enough, he could pretend to feel the warmth of another right next to him. 

At this point, Baldwin awaited death and when it came he would welcome it with open arms. It wasn't just the illness that plagued him, but terrible loneliness as well.

He felt as if the last few years of his life were nothing more than wasted potential and with so much time alone to think, he couldn't escape these thoughts. As the physicians filed into the room and began to work gently on his frail body, the thoughts remained.

It wasn't until Baldwin was informed about the arrival of princess y/n and her family that the horrible thoughts of death left his mind. His interest sparked at the mention of her name and the name of her father, who had gone down in history for winning many battles in his youth.

Their family would be staying at the castle as they searched for a husband for the young princess y/n. She was the same age as Baldwin and was known for her gentle kindness and beauty.

That was all he knew of her.

Deep down in his heart, the young king secretly wished that he would be the one to marry her. But he knew that was simply impossible.

Possible technically, yes. But would she want to? Absolutely not. In his mind at least. 

And when he layed eyes on her for the first time, it was clear he never had a chance. She wasn't just beautiful, she was a work of art. Truly stunning in every possible way.

Her hair, her eyes, her lips. She was perfect, she was gorgeous, and she was… staring right at him? With a small smile and rosy cheeks.

Her bright eyes twinkled in the sun when she looked his way, causing him to blush behind the mask. He simply couldn't tear his gaze away from her and it seemed that she couldn't do the same.

After dinner, Baldwin was just leaving the physicians quarters to retire to his chambers for the night when he was startled by y/n standing right behind a corner.

Noticing him jump, y/n chuckled. “I'm so sorry your majesty, it's only me” she said, her voice soothing as she placed a delicate hand on his arm.

The touch made Baldwin’s heart race even faster than it already was.

“Oh it-it's quite alright princess. I'm just a little on edge is all. Long day” he tried desperately to steady his heart, especially when she blinked slowly and looked into his eyes with what appeared to be adoration. But it couldn't be, right?

The two got to talking as Baldwin offered to escort her to her chambers for the night which she gladly took him up on the offer.

They spoke of her marriage and how she hoped to finally find a husband as she had been so lonely. In turn, Baldwin spoke of his own misfortune in finding a partner.

“I don't know why no one has asked to marry you princess. You're wonderful” Baldwin told her as they reached her door. Y/n chuckled, blush spreading across her cheeks.

“You're too kind my lord. I could say the same about you, you know. I mean, look at you! You're a beautiful young man” she said, her voice gentle and kind.

Baldwin felt surreal.

Nobody had ever said something like that to him before. Not since the disease had ravished his body at least.

Sensing his bashfulness, y/n smiled and placed a hand on his masked cheek.

“You need not be so hard on yourself Baldwin. From what I have heard, you are a strong leader and a brave one too. My father holds much respect for you and I do too. But after this interaction, I hold much more than respect for you and I hope we can speak more tomorrow” the princess said with a smile.

Baldwin took her hand in his, holding it to his chest.

“I would love that more than you will ever know, princess”.

The two said their goodnights and retired to their chambers, each with a warm feeling of anticipation for what the next day would bring.

But the young king couldn't sleep. His mind was flooded with different scenarios.

Maybe she did want to marry him? But if she did, their marriage would be short and surely childless. Wouldn't that put her off being wed to him if she were to spend half of her life as a widow?

That night Baldwin prayed and prayed to God on his knees for a second chance. For a second chance at life, to be wed to y/n, to live a normal life with her.

He begged until he couldn't think anymore. Staggering over to his bed, Baldwin fell into a deep sleep. Morning came in no time.

--------------------

The following morning, Baldwin awoke as usual. But something was different.

He felt happy, he felt excited and looked forward to the day ahead.

He got out of his bed on his own and dressed himself before the physicians arrived, who were shocked to see him so mobile without immense pain so early in the day.

Y/n was much the same.

Since first laying eyes on the young king, her heart belonged to him. Before seeing Baldwin for the first time, the idea of marriage disgusted her. She didn't want to end up like her friends, forced into a relationship with a man far older than her who controlled her every move.

But after seeing and speaking to him, the idea of marriage seemed amazing. He was so kind and sweet but he seemed so sad.

She wanted more than anything to be the one who would make him happy. She knew of his leprosy as many did but that didn't bother her in the slightest. All she saw was a kind and gentle soul in need of love.

When y/n arrived at Baldwin’s chambers, he was overjoyed to see her. They spent the entire day together, talking and laughing, walking around the courtyard and playing chess. 

By evening, neither wanted the day to end. Neither wanted to leave each other's side at all for that matter.

But one good thing happened that evening and that was Baldwin requesting her hand in marriage (with the blessing of her father of course). Y/n grinned with delight and accepted without hesitation.

As the two spoke together on the couch in Baldwin’s chambers, the sun sank below the horizon leaving the kingdom in peaceful darkness.

Baldwin had removed his mask, revealing his bandaged face to her.

Much to his delight, y/n did nothing but compliment him and stare lovingly into his eyes for the whole evening.

As time went on, the young king felt himself growing more and more tired. His eyes struggled to remain open, but he didn't want his soon to be wife to leave.

He wanted her by his side, forever.

Y/n noticed this and smiled at the sleepy expression he wore while she spoke.

“You should get some rest, your highness” she said softly, placing a hand on his thigh.

“But I don't want you to leave,” he replied, his voice suddenly small. Her heart broke for him. So many years feeling alone and unlovable.

Y/n thought for a moment, “I have an idea!” she spoke after a second.

Baldwin looked up at her with curiosity.

“Why don't you get into bed and I will hold you until you fall asleep, then I will leave. Then we have no risk of being accused of adultery!”

A large grin spread across Baldwin's face, it was the cutest thing she had ever seen. “That would be perfect!” he exclaimed.

Baldwin got changed and climbed into bed, laying down on his usual side of the bed. But this time, he tossed the decorative pillows to the floor.

Y/n climbed into the bed beside him, “just get comfortable and I will hold you” she told him, her voice filled with love.

Baldwin nodded and turned on his side away from her, snuggling into the covers with a smile. Y/n waited a moment, then wrapped her arms around him from behind, pulling him closer so his back was pressed against her chest and her head was resting slightly above his, his blonde curls tickled her nose making her giggle with happiness.

“This is everything I have ever wanted,” the young king whispered, his voice gentle and sleepy.

“Likewise, my love. Just rest now, I will just be in my chambers when you wake” y/n replied, pressing a kiss to the back of his head.

Baldwin nodded and yawned, burying himself further into her arms. The young king was fast asleep in no time, lulled into rest by her warmth.

The single sound of a soft snore broke the silence. The quiet sound of rest told the princess that it was time to leave. As much as she didnt want to, she had to.

Unwrapping her arms carefully so as to not wake him, y/n stood and went to leave. But she couldn't, not yet.

Walking over to Baldwin’s side of the bed, she smiled down at his sleeping form.

Y/n bent down and kissed his forehead lightly.

“I can't wait until every night can be like this my darling. Rest well” she whispered before turning to leave.

Retreating into the night with anticipation for what the next day would bring.

[phoebosacerales]

Predicting children and pregnancy: Angelina Jolie - part 1

Months ago I received a question in my ask box about pregnancy indicators in predictive techniques. I started studying it and looking at one specific famous case: Angelina Jolie. She has 6 children and I decided to look at the astrology of every time she adopted or got pregnant, and this obviously became a big task, so this study will be divided into 5 parts, which will all be posted in full exclusively on my Patreon page, where you can get a membership or purchase the articles. Here I'll give you a preview of the first part where I discuss the natal promise and the adoption of her first child.

First, let's understand the possible indicators for children in someone's destiny. This kind of thing in astrology causes some debate, so I'll go through the classic significators and also point out problems, which you can disagree with me, they're just my own thoughts.

The 5th house is the most obvious. It's the house of conception, procreation, and the bearing of children. It's the succedent house of the IC angle, showing what comes into the 4th house, what adds to the family. It's also the house with which the ascendant makes a trine, symbolizing the things we create and share much in common because they come from us.

Venus rejoices in the 5th house. This could mean that Venus also carries a bit of the signification of children. It's not a very orthodox association, but I definitely think we have to consider it, since the logic of lending meaning from the joys always apply with the other planets and with Venus itself when it comes to its other topics. Valens says that Venus "indicates the mother and nurture." By doing this, he connects Venus to the mother and not to pregnancy or the baby. But I'm suspicious of this association because of the centrality of men in ancient texts. They could've been just associating Venus with women/wives, because it's the planet of love/marriage, and what does a woman do? She's part of a man's patrimony and gives him heirs. ¹ So I suspect this could be a classic case of conflation of women and children, and sometimes I'd rather see Venus simply as pregnancy/children because of its relationship to the 5th house, it makes more sense to me. The fact that matters relating to women cause so much confusion and controversy when we look at ancient astrological texts is not at all surprising, given patriarchal economy and the lack of acknowledgement of women's existence or perspectives by these astrologers.

The association of the Moon with pregnancy, mothers or people who gestate is a consensus that I dare not question. The Moon is a luminary, therefore considered a life-giver, and is very easily symbolically linked to the material process of pregnancy.

Jupiter is the one classically associated with children. Valens says that "Jupiter indicates childbearing, engendering, desire, loves, prosperity, great gifts, an abundance of crops". It's understandable to include Jupiter, because benefics are fertile and humid. On the other hand it's still kinda weird, because Jupiter is associated with children mostly because it signifies wealth and prosperity. I have issues with our treatment of children as patrimony, but in our world that's unfortunately how it works currently. It's systemic and not a question of personal views or perspective.

Another interesting thing to look at is the lot of children. I use the classic Dorotheus formula (Asc + Saturn - Jupiter for day and night charts). I can't explain why it works. It's just like that sometimes, some things I just don't know.

Angelina Jolie's Natal Chart

Mars as the Master (oikodespotes) and the Lord (kurios) of the Nativity

The master is the a ruler that has to do with overall health and length of life, and the lord determines the native's destiny. Mars takes both roles here. It rules the 5th and occupies and rules the 10th and the MC. Obviously, this is a person who's made a career (10th) in the arts and entertainment and is a UN goodwill ambassador (also 5th house), and her children were made important in her career and reputation. The conjunction with the Moon makes her own identity very intertwined with her children and career, her children are always accompanying her when we see her anywhere. The conjunction with Jupiter and the Moon makes the topics of career and children connect a lot to travel or foreign lands, and this is someone whose relationship with other countries is very important and whose 6 children were all born and/or adopted abroad.

Triplicity rulers the Moon: Sun, Jupiter and Saturn

Sun in the 12th: This is a day chart, but the Moon takes over as the predominant luminary, because the Sun is not eligible in the 12th house. But then the Sun is the first triplicity ruler of the sign of the Moon, while also being exalted by her. I understand her 12th house as very much related to her interest in charity and humanitarian work, because it reveals her concern for what is hidden and marginalized. That's how the 12th house can look for people that come from very privileged backgrounds. Also, her most "12th house role", which was in "Girl, Interrupted", happened during a Mercury period, the ruler and occupant of her 12th.

Jupiter in the 10th: religion, travel, justice, etc.

Saturn in the 1st: others, foreigners, marriage, relationships come to the forefront; risks to the body.

The Ascendant in Cancer

Saturn and Venus on the ascendant makes her life revolve around others, family and relationships. Venus obviously reinforces the relationship to the arts, the diplomatic and humanitarian work and also being a sex symbol. Saturn rules the 7th and 8th, making the relationships difficult and scandalous and also bringing risks, for example: her story with her cancer prevention treatment. The Moon is the native herself. She's a very maternal figure, yet strong in a martial sense, and very popular and famous (10th house and conjunction with Jupiter). Cancer is often associated not only with motherhood and care, but also with excavation, archaeology, or paleontology, or history, or storytelling, or any study of the original or where things come from. Add this to Mars in Aries and there you have Lara Croft: Tomb Raider (btw, Indiana Jones is also played by a huge Cancerian).

Lot of Fortune in Taurus 29°

The lot is in the house of the Good Daimon, said to be the most benefic house, while its ruler Venus is one of the strongest planets for being so close to the ascendant and in its own triplicity. Beauty, art, seduction, children, reproduction and fertility are what Angelina's luck holds. Also a rich family (4th house) of artists with great connections (11th) in their industry.

Lot of Children in Libra 29°

This one is also ruled by Venus. This means that for her we'll be considering Venus even more to see things about children. Venus is in the 10th relative to the lot of children in a tight aspect with it, and with the lot of Fortune as well. The very powerful positions of Venus and Mars show how children would be a prolific topic in this person's destiny.

Time Lords

Now we'll look at the time when she adopted her first child, Maddox.

....

Get a membership on my Patreon and continue reading.

[rawliverandgoronspice]

I'm thinking about going back to my old Zelda WIPs and continuing writing them. Since Ganondorf is a huge part of them, and you have a PHD in Gerudo, I was hoping you could help me with some tips. How do I avoid orientalism as much as possible while still keeping him morally grey and/or a villain? (Different incarnations are different degrees of morality in my fics).

It's ok if you just forward links from your blog where you already discussed it. I'd just like directions on how to find them, hehe.

Hellooo I'm sorry it took me so long to get to your ask, I wanted to make sure I had good refs for it (and was very busy ;;)

So I do not think I can claim to have a PhD in Gerudo when tumblr users @bloobluebloo and @blackautmedia share this website with me (among others), but I can recommand Bloo's thoughts overall, their blog is a great resource; and Blackautmedia has done an amazing and super thorough breakdown of the Gerudo situation (and TotK) in this Youtube video.

(and of course, Edward Saïd's body of work for a more precise breakdown of Orientalism, where it comes from, why it exists, and the countless ways in which it manifests in culture and geopolitics)

To give my own two cents on the matter, I think there's several things to take into account:

the very framework being proposed by Nintendo is born out of orientalist sensitivities, and so a lot of the very fundamental ideas that led to the gerudos and Ganondorf existing as they do will never be neutral. That doesn't mean we can't do anything with them or that they are inherently corrupted (tho some people think the subject is messy enough to make them unwilling to engage with it in any way, which is fair enough), but any narrative decision being taken will probably carry on that weight, that framework. Some parts (like the very harem-like logic of the one guy many girls --even if it's not how gerudos are interacting within canon, we know where the inspiration came from) are kind of very deeply baked in. We can recontextualize it and make it interesting or human or complicated or just not really deal with it (or break the rules entirely, some people decide they don't want to deal with the one guy many girls situation and more power to them honestly), but there's only so much anyone can do about the framework. There's going to be some authorial intent happening no matter what.

Speaking of authorial intent, I guess my (general tbh) advice is: know what interests you, be sensitive to your own internal motivations, be informed of other people's perspectives, and figure out what you are comfortable with, and why. It's a combination of what drives you and being aware of the choices you're making. You can even disagree with other perspectives of course, but it's about making sure you understand your own reasoning and can stand by it within your own art.

Then I guess my main take is: Ganondorf can be as brutal and as selfish as he wants (as a treat) and that will never erase the fact that he lives in a feudal world where the main neighboring kingdom has arbitrarily decided his people (and by extension himself) is considered lesser than a hylian, and that his only path to being considered good is to accept that reality for himself, and kneel and happily become a vassal with zero resentment towards anything. That is kind of the fundamental Zelda game situation: Ganondorf being dissatisfied at his own status leads to him reaching for the biggest source of power available, at any cost. Then, you can complicate him in ways as extreme as him saying he went on to this quest for the sake of his people and was vilified in extreme ways as punishment for this, or in less extreme ways, by deciding he did throw his entire people under the bus with complete disregard --but that it doesn't change the fundamental injustice that pushed him to pursue this path of domination for his own selfish sake. And then, there's entire worlds of nuance between these two extremes, and many, many ways to sidestep what I just outlined and decide this is an AU and Ganondorf's story is about something else entirely.

Honestly, my biggest suggestion is just: give this dude an internal world. It doesn't have to be a sensitive and tearful one, but just some internal reasoning, a sense of purpose, and weave in some of the qualities we see in the games in which he appears, and you have a guy who can cause a big mess and still be terrifying and still be a person.

And then of course I could start to wax poetry about all the angles I see one could pursue with him, all of his relationship to the gods, to fate, to agency and control, to violence and strife and resistance and madness and humanity and and and --yeah there's a lot to find in that thick red hair of his in my opinion, and it's just about... kind of, being interested in that. It doesn't have to be the main focus of course, and you can just have a Ganondorf who's there to provide conflict and be a big guy who's really into having the fight of his life, but there's always this risk of forgetting why he's angry, what shaped him, and therefore falling into tropes of... I don't know, he's a rapist for no reason just because it felt logical that he would be one 🙃 (not saying it can never ever be a take, but to refuse to give him any room for introspection on why he ever would be one given both his very... "I never showed even a hint of sexual interest towards anyone in canon" + "I grew up among a group of ostracized-yet-fetishized women" circumstances might just be the orientalism speaking unfortunately )

So yee!! Those are my perspective!! I hope it's helpful in any way!!!